Life Lessons 101

Welcome 2012?

2012-01-16T12:10:00.002-05:00

So, it's 2012. The NEW year. It the time of year when we find ourselves surrounded by fresh, blank calenders just waiting to be filled, time spent (at least briefly) working on our resolutions to make our selves thinner, healthier, financially more secure and just plain happier. We've put away the Christmas decorations, made lists of all the things we're going to accomplish this year and reassured ourselves that 2012 is gonna be the best one yet! Right?

.............Well, I gotta say. I'm just not feelin' it.

I feel like in past years I've made (and broken) all of the resolutions to make myself over from head to toe. I've sworn that by summer, my bod would be ready for the beach, my house would be in pristine condition, my bank account would be filled to overflowing and my love life would be the envy of women the world over.

And yet here I find myself.

As I contemplate participating in the Mini Marathon on May 5th, I realize that while I was never in fabulous shape, this is the furthest my body has ever been from being ready for a long-distance event! There are bulges and bits sticking out everywhere and there's no WAY I'm looking cute in running clothes any time soon! The saddest part is that while I'm aware that there are just over 100 days until the race, on most days, the most I can force myself to do is spend 30 minutes or so taking the dog for a brisk walk. The mere thought of actually jogging for 13.1 miles in FRONT of people in 100 days has be breaking out in hives.

Source

Despite getting brand spanking new floors in my bedroom, my house feels like it's in a constant state of chaos wavering on complete anarchy. When I put in the new floors, I decided to ditch my bed frame since I hate it, so I'm sporting the oh so cool "box springs and mattress on the floor" look circa early 90s. I haven't found a replacement frame or been inspired by what I might replace the bed frame with, so there it sits. On the ground. Oh. And did I mention that in moving the bed, I discovered that the structure of the box springs are cracked so it needs to be replaced? Fabulous!

Source

That brings me to my money woes. Not only do I hate my current bed frame, I don't have any money to replace it. Yeah. It's great. Each month, there seems to be more going out than coming in. I'm not an extravagant spender, so I'm not sure how to fix this problem just yet.

Finally, there is my sad excuse for a love live. Currently I like to think of it more as a desert wasteland. According to my friends, I'm "a really great person" but according to members of the opposite sex who might be available for a date, I don't exist. I often joke that I could stand naked next to a beautiful woman and the only response I would hear would be, "Hey! Who's that girl next to the naked girl?!" I do not exaggerate! In the past 6 months, the only nibbles I have had have been from a man who lives about 3 hours away (I'm not interested in a man I only get to see once every 2 or 3 months) and a man (I use the term loosely) who I met on EHarmony that kept asking when we were gonna "hang out". Perhaps I'm a bit too picky and maybe things are different than they were 8 years ago when I met Troy and started dating him, but is it too much to be asked out on a proper date more than 2 days in advance? All I'm asking for is a bit of effort, planning and a smidge of chivalry.

So, maybe 2012 will be the best year yet. I would LOVE to see that!

Or maybe the Mayans are right and we'll just be put out of our misery come December.

Whatever the case may be, today, I'm just not feeling the "Happy New Year" spirit yet.

Snapshot Sunday #8

2011-12-25T09:00:00.000-05:00

As part of completing # 91 on my list (Complete the 100 Snapshots Challenge), I thought I'd share with you the snapshots that I've captured so far in a segment I'm gonna call Snapshot Sunday (catchy, huh?). I shot most of these with my Canon Digital SLR camera. However some of them were taken early in the challenge on my Kodak Easyshare. I have done some slight editing using www.picnik.com. I LOVE Picnik. It's so cool!

To see the Snapshots from the previous weeks, go here.

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

54. Cream

58. Field

59. Two

64. Chase

65. Dream

Snapshot Sunday #7

2011-12-18T09:00:00.010-05:00

To see the Snapshots from the previous weeks, go here.

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

14. Wrong

25. Drops

29. Covered

31. High

49. Dark

Snapshot Sunday #6

2011-12-11T09:00:00.024-05:00

To see the Snapshots from the previous weeks, go here.

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

9. Colorless

13. Irony

16. Feel

32. Shadow

41. Wonder

Snapshot Sunday #5

2011-12-04T09:00:00.000-05:00

To see the Snapshots from the previous weeks, go here.

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

73. Rust

83. Release

84. Gather

89. Distance

90. Trapped

Snapshot Sunday #4

2011-11-27T09:00:00.001-05:00

To see the Snapshots from the previous weeks, go here.

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

60. Red

62. Rope

67. Smile

68. Smirk

70. Soul

Snapshot Sunday #3

2011-11-20T09:00:00.001-05:00

To see the Snapshots from the previous weeks, go here.

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

42. Sweet

45. Fall

46. Chair

51. Garbage

53. Teacher

Snapshot Sunday #2

2011-11-13T09:00:00.001-05:00

To see the Snapshots from the previous weeks, go here.

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

12. Growth

19. Within

23. Scar

33. Concrete

36. Yellow

Songfest Saturday #2

2011-11-12T12:00:00.000-05:00

It's week #2 of my Songfest!

This week I thought I'd share an artist whose music I have come to love. Amazingly enough, I didn't actually find her myself. Instead, Troy stumbled upon her music and bought her CD for me for Christmas a while back. It was truly an amazing gift and I was overwhelmed by how much he "got me" by choosing to share her music with me. She spoke to my musical interests (and my soul) in a language the I felt like I knew by heart. Before I knew it, she had joined the short list of my go-to artists that I would search for on a regular basis.

Her name is Kris Delmhorst. For the album that Troy purchased for me, Ms. Delmhorst took the lyrics to some amazing poetry and added her own music. It's such a phenomenal thing when you love not only the music, but the lyrics as well. That is when music REALLY speaks to me! Here are a few of my favorites:

To check out her latest offering "Cars" go to www.krisdelmhorst.com. It an album of songs by the Cars with her own arrangements and unique voice. Check it out!

It doesn't hurt to ask!

2011-11-09T12:06:00.000-05:00

This morning as I was going through my bills that need to be paid, I noticed that one of the credit cards that I have charged me a small finance fee despite the fact that I paid off the card before the end of last month. The only thing that I use this card for is balance transfers and until this month, it was carrying a 0% finance fee. I guess the 0% promotional rate expired this month, so they were charging me a fee based on the daily balance and my current rate on that card.

I have been a loyal customer with them for quite a while. I always pay my bill on time and I am nowhere near the limit on that card. (I could buy a VERY nice car with the limit on that card alone! - YIKES!) So I decided to practice what I preach to my friends. I am always telling them that if they aren't happy with the rates they are getting on their credit cards or the fees they are being charged, call them up and see what they can do for you. If you are a good customer with a good record of payment, you are worth your weight in gold to them and they have a LOT of leeway as far as rates and fees go!

So, I called them up..... On the phone..... And requested that they remove the finance fee (less than $7.00). That is all. I didn't raise a big stink. I didn't get mad (it was only $7.00). I simply asked if they might be able to remove that fee for me.

And they did! After looking at my history with them, Ron, the very helpful customer service man said, "Why, yes, Miss H. I would be happy to do that for you!"

So, now that I'm $7.00 ahead, I'm going to use my credit card "winnings" to go buy lunch. It will be the yummiest sandwich ever!

Bah Hum Bug

2011-11-07T23:19:00.000-05:00

Ok, people! It's November 7th. NOVEMBER. For those of you who are counting, that's nearly 50 DAYS until Christmas.

I love Christmas. I really do. But I think the advertisers have gone too far!

I realize that the period from Thanksgiving until Christmas is when the retailers make their real money for the year, but while watching TV tonight, I saw no fewer than 5 Christmas commercials. SERIOUSLY!

It was bad enough when there were Halloween decorations out in August, but how about we at least get to show our appreciation with Thanksgiving before we are bombarded with Christmas music, clanging Salvation Army bells and repeated airings of "It's a Wonderful Life"?

I'm just saying.

Snapshot Sunday #1

2011-11-06T09:00:00.001-05:00

Please do not use these photos without my consent and do not attempt to pass them off as your own work. Thank you

1. Safety

5. Open

7. Love

8. Touch

10. Blue

Songfest Saturday #1

2011-11-05T12:02:00.000-04:00

I don't know about all of you, but sometimes on the weekends, when I SHOULD have some free time for perusing all of the lovely blogs on my blogroll, I don't seem to have that time. Instead, my Saturday usually gets filled with laundry, dishes, taking the dog to the park, cleaning up the mess around the house that I made during the week and any and all other projects that haven't been crossed off my to do list. So instead of bringing you a long-winded post, I thought Saturday afternoon might be the perfect time to share some of my favorite music.

As anyone who knows me can attest, I'm a big fan of rooting for the underdog and that extends to the artists who fill my MP3 player. I LOVE finding artists that hardly anyone has heard of. It's a great way to find undiscovered talent when they are in the phase where they truly appreciate their fans.

I had the pleasure of going to see "The Civil Wars" last night with a friend. They are an amazing duo made up of Joy Williams and John Paul White that is fun and funny. (Yes, John Paul does look an awful lot like Johnny Depp!) I'm sure I've share them with you here before. Here's one of my most recent favorites of theirs. It's called "I've Got This Friend":

Their opening act was Milo Greene made up of 4 guys and a girl. They are in their mid-twenties and a real pleasure to listen to. They have a mini CD consisting of just 4 songs, which feels like an appetizer to a meal I can hardly wait to taste! It's great to see them in the formative stage. I just know they are gonna go somewhere! Give them a listen:

Beautiful boots!

2011-11-04T23:10:00.031-04:00

I recently went to the Chicago for a special trip. Stay tuned for more on that! It was very exciting!

While walking around the Windy City, I noticed LOTS of people were wearing boots. Some were your standard UGG boots, but others had lots of laces and buckles and bows. They were made of suede and leather; had wedge heels and "break-your-neck" heels. At first I thought it was odd because it wasn't that cold, but clearly I have missed the fashion bandwagon and boots are BIG this year!

The boot fashion show continued tonight when I attended a concert. All the cool girls were wearing them!

For a girl with big calves, this is a heart breaker! I would LOVE to own a pair (or a closet full of) amazing boots. Alas, my feet are a tiny size 6 1/2 and I have calves the size of tree trunks! No fair!

So I'm on the hunt for some fabulous boots that will make me look amazing, fit my foot and calf and not break the bank. Have any thoughts on where I should start my search?

What hot fashion trend are you on the look-out for?

Are you guilty of downgrading your dreams?

2011-11-03T23:17:00.000-04:00

The other day as I was driving home, I had to take a detour around some traffic. As I cut through a neighborhood near my house I drove down a street that I'd never been on. As I rounded the corner onto this street, I saw a gorgeous house. It was a beautiful shade of brick red with white shutters and a lovely white picket fence. The second story windows were complete with flower boxes bursting with mums. The lawn was well-manicured and it looked like the owner truly loved their house. As I drove down the street, I thought, "I would love to have that house."

As those thoughts floated across my mind, they were nearly instantaneously erased by a voice that told me that I would never own a house that lovely. Instead, the voice turned my attention to a house that was down the street. It was a shade of brown that could only have been called "Cow manure". It looked dank and dreary and simply depressing. Judging by the exterior of the house, the floor plan was awkward and too large to be a ranch style home. That insidious internal voice told me that that ugly brown house was something I should settle for instead. How depressing.

This mere 10-second conversation in my head has had me thinking for several days. It seems to me that for nearly my whole life I've been settling for less than what I truly want.

When I wanted the hottest new toy as a child, but I couldn't wait long enough to save up the money, I would instead buy the knock-off that was poorly made and didn't last as long.

When I went to buy my first car, I wanted a cool red car that was sporty and fun. After all, I young and what better time is there to be sport and fun? I ended up with a beige sedan.

When I wanted love and marriage and a family, I stayed with a man for seven years even though he told me in the beginning of the relationship that he wasn't ready for those things. I was sure that he would come around. I was wrong.

Instead of holding out for those things that I truly want, I invariably settle. The question that has been going around and around in my mind these last few days is "Why?" Why do I settle for second best instead of holding out for that brass ring or red convertible or the love of a truly amazing man? And the answer I keep coming back to is "because I don't deserve the best."

The fact that this thought goes through my head on an apparently regular basis and that I've been living my life a certain way because of it infuriates me. The world does a pretty good job of trying to keep us and our dreams in check. Why am I helping it out? Why am I downgrading my dreams?

Despite the fact that I'm in my 30s and still single, I hold out hope that when I am ready for him, a truly amazing man will come into my life. Not an ok guy. An amazing guy.

They say that knowing is half the battle, so now that I know how I've been short-changing myself and downgrading my dreams, I'm gonna do my best to stop it. Right now.

How about you? Are you guilty of settling for less than you truly deserve? What are you going to do today to change that? How will your life look different after this realization?

Oprah's Life Class Part 1

2011-11-02T23:22:00.000-04:00

Have you all been watching Oprah's Life Class? It's on OWN TV, which I actually don't get because I don't have digital cable (perhaps Ms. O could do something about the availability of her channel), but I've been tuning in to the webcasts on Friday nights.

I've been a fan of Oprah for a long time and I generally liked the direction her show took. Over the course of the 25 years that she was on the air with the Oprah Winfrey Show, I feel like she used the platform she had to truly help people become their best version of themselves.

Her Life Class picks up where her show left off and over the last 3 weeks the topics that she's covered have really made an impact on me and the way that I've been looking at myself, my life and the people in it as I live each day.

As this month's NaBloPoMo proceeds, I'll share more about the lessons I've learned as well as an exciting event that took place just a few days ago. Stay tuned for more....

I think I can...I think I can....

2011-11-01T23:46:00.000-04:00

I have a confession to make. I hope that you won't judge me, but I have to put it out there.

I have a fear of failure.

It's true.

But that's not the worst part.

Apparently I also have a fear of success. UGH.

#4 on my list (Make one blog entry every day for a month) has simply been taunting me since I put it on the list. Nearly every month of this year, I've been telling you all that this month is when I'm gonna get that crossed off of the list. And every month I invariably fall on my face around day #5. It's horrible. I'm sure by now all of you as my loyal readers (all 2 of you) have realized not to believe me. You are a wise lot.

I really do have the best of intentions, I swear! I simply run into brick walls of obligations, excuses and writer's block. I either have plenty of ideas and no time to write or plenty of time to write and nothing to say. (It's really more the first than the second because heaven knows I usually have PLENTY of things to say).

So, I hate to do this, but I'm gonna give it another go. This month is the official anniversary of NaBloPoMo, so I really am gonna give it the ol' college try! I have tons of items from my list to update you on and I'm even working on some themes for the days of the week to give me a bit of a jumping off point.

Thanks for hanging in there with me. You all are the best!

In case you need a REALLY good laugh...

2011-09-03T09:26:00.001-04:00

Sometimes technology is funny. REALLY REALLY funny! I just got a new smartphone that has an autocorrect feature on it. What is autocorrect? According to dictionary.com, it's:

Definition:

an automatic feature in software that corrects common spelling and capitalization errors, and can replace certain designated characters with special symbols

It's basically a feature that tries to guess what you're trying to type in a text message based on what's most commonly used by you and/or other people.

So, I was reading some posts on Facebook the other day and stumbled upon http://www.damnyouautocorrect.com/. This is by far one of the most hilarious things I've seen on the internet in a LONG time.

My suggestion to you is to grab a box of tissues because you WILL be laughing until you cry, settle into a place where you can freely laugh (I first viewed this at work and I was concerned that my coworkers would worry about my sudden outbursts of laughter and/or the coffee spewing forth from my nose) and prepare to make your side hurt from the laughter.

You're welcome.

Ask not what I can do for you....but what you can do for the list!

2011-09-02T11:45:00.000-04:00

There are officially just 222 days left for me to complete a LOT of items on my list! That's not much time and I have a LOT of stuff left to cross off. Many of you have been very sweet and asking me how you can help. I can't tell you how much I appreciate this and all of you.

So in order to help you (and mostly me) out, I've been going over the list.

The beauty of the list is that it is my own creation and I get to make things up as I go along!

So here are a few list items I would LOVE your help with:

1) Donate 1,000,000 grains of rice through http://www.freerice.com/. - Originally my intent was for me to donate all of these all on my own, but time is running short and I am WAAY behind! So, I'd love your help! The best part is that it's easy, costs nothing for you to help and takes hardly any time! It couldn't get any easier. Simply go to http://www.freerice.com/. Answer some simple vocabulary (or math or geography) questions. Each one you get right donates 10 grains of rice. There are no penalties for wrong answers. If it takes 10 seconds to answer each question, you can donate more than 300 grains of rice in just 5 minutes! If I can get 10 friends to donate 500 grains each each day, we can knock this one off of the list in no time. Simply leave me a comment here or on my Facebook page telling me how many grains you donated that day and I'll add them to the total! I'll keep you posted on how we're doing.

2) If you know me IRL (In real life) and see me, give me a hug and then tell me to write it down! I have 30 hugs so far, so I'm VERY close to finishing the 50 hugs. Don't worry. You'll remain anonymous.

3) Pennies...pennies...pennies. Once again, if you know me IRL, I need your pennies! They are just weighing you (and your purse, wallet, pants, etc) down. They may not be worth a lot to you, but if we can put them all together, we can do amazing things with those little coins!

For those of you who don't know me IRL, stay tuned for ways that you can help to.

That's all I have for now, but if you see something on the list you'll like to help with (eat sushi, walk a few thousand steps with me, go for a bicycle ride - 1000 miles still needed!, go to a mystery theater dinner, golf a few holes, etc etc etc), please speak up. I'd love the company and the change to make some new friends. (Getting to know old friends better is wonderful too!)

Life gets in the way....

2011-08-22T13:10:00.000-04:00

This summer I've been completely remiss in posting with any regularity at all. But that's not all bad, right? Ok, it's true that there are people who insist that to have a blog, you should post every day. And that's probably true if you're trying to build a business or a following. But I'm trying to build a life.

And life has a way of getting in the way.

My blog posts are often random and may seemingly go nowhere. They range in topic from my motorcycle adventures to what I like to think of as "deep thoughts by Heather." I've tried to post on topics that I think people want to read about, but trying to mold my content like that doesn't fit who I am anymore.

And life has a way of getting in the way.

Over the past few weeks there are lots of times that I've thought of all of you and wanted to share what I'm thinking or feeling. When I was struck weak by something tragic (the stage collapse at the Indiana State Fair) or left speechless by the beauty of something that I've seemingly passed every day.

But life has a way of getting in the way.

When I started this blog, it was about sharing my 101 in 1001 and all the interesting stories that go with those adventures. It slowly morphed into a place that I could go and let it all hang out virtually. I wrote what I wanted. If it popped into my head, I probably told you all about it. And I felt like I could do that because nobody was listening anyway, right? If I write something offensive in the middle of the woods and there is no one to hear it, is anyone offended anyway?

But then people started to read.

And that's a good thing, right? Don't we all want to be heard? The problem is when we feel like we can't really speak anymore. Are we really being heard anymore then? Putting it all out there is most definitely cathartic and I never intend to hurt anyone's feelings. But people's feelings have a way of getting hurt anyway.

And people have a way of getting in the way.

So I guess I've held back.

And holding back has a way of getting in the way.

Of creating.
Of sharing.
Of living.
Of knowing.
Of being known.
Of loving.

So I'm going to do the scary thing. And I'm going to start again.

I'm going to begin creating again.
I'm going to start sharing again.
I'm going to try living again.
I'm going to seek to know again.
I'm going to be open to being known again.

I am going to do the scary thing.

I'm going to try loving again.

Fiction - a life shaper

2011-08-02T23:41:00.002-04:00

A month of fiction would not be complete without talking about writing!

Yes, I write on this blog, but as a mathematician, I don't really spend much of my time trying to be creative linguistically (nice word, huh?).

But at one point in my life, that wasn't true. And I would venture a guess that even my closest friends don't know that.

It all started when I was in first grade. I was a good kid. A really good kid! So you can imagine my horror when my teacher told me that she needed to see me in the hallway. Egad! That's where the BAD kids went when they were in trouble! What could I have done?!?

But I wasn't in trouble. I mean, really. How could I be? I mentioned I was a good kid, right? haha

No, instead, my teacher, Mrs. G said she had a special project just for me. There was an event that she wanted me to participate in. It was called the Young Authors and Artists conference. She wanted me to write a book. An entire book!

So for the next few weeks instead of going outside to play, I was writing. If I wanted to have fun, my mom would ask me how the book was coming. It seems like every waking moment was spent at the kitchen table carefully writing the story and illustrating the pages. (It was really only probably 10 pages, but that's a LOT for a first grader to write AND illustrate!)

So when the book was finished, I attended the conference with my mom. We were separated by age and each group of kids (and their parents) went to a separate room where we talked about our books and showed the other participants. Then we got to "autograph" each other's book.

While this may not seem like a big deal to some, it was a very cool thing to me.

But the best thing wasn't my signature on the books of other people, it was the signature of one particular little girl on my book. As I have said, we were in first grade. We were writing on unlined paper and I was fascinated by this little girl's signature because she wrote in a straight line! ....without lines on the paper!

So, here's my question. Why is THAT the big thing that I remember about this entire story? Why did that little girl's signature make me want to be someone who could write in a straight line on unlined paper? Why did that one seemingly insignificant event in my life become part of who I am today?

NaBloPoMo - August 2011 - Fiction

2011-08-01T12:10:00.001-04:00

This month's theme for NaBloPoMo is "Fiction".

So here's my question: Fact or Fiction? I will be able to ACTUALLY complete an entire month of blog posts and get that item crossed off of my list?

Stay tuned to find out!

Florence and the Fourth!

2011-07-04T23:45:00.001-04:00

Happy Fourth of July, everybody! I hope you had a wonderful day and evening enjoying the freedoms we have!

I was lucky enough to cross off an item on my list this evening! #7 Attend a concert at White River State Park.

White River State Park is a green space across from the Indianapolis Zoo and The Indianapolis Indians Victory Field. On any given day you can see people walking or biking around the park, lying in the grass and relaxing or playing a game of frisbee.

A few years ago a bandshell was built and since then the area has hosted a variety of musical acts and festivals. It's a short walk from the downtown canal and ever since the bandshell was built, I have wanted to see a concert there.

Tonight I finally got a chance and went to see an excellent concert put on by Florence and the Machine. The music was great and the atmosphere is perfect for a summer concert, but the audience faces west during the show, so the sun was directly in our eyes for most of the concert.

If I go to a concert there again, I will probably splurge and get the reserved seats rather than the general admission. The reserved seats were shaded by the bandshell and probably had a much better view of the stage and performer.

Thanks so much to my friend Patrick for going to the concert with me! I hope he had fun!

Do epic $hit!

2011-07-03T23:46:00.000-04:00

The other day a friend of mine posted a link on Facebook. Some of you may have already read this entry by Johnny B. Truant, but if you haven't, take a gander over at "The Universe Doesn't Give a Flying Fuck About You". It's a little long, but TOTALLY worth it!

The upshot is that life is SHORT and we need to find ways to do Epic Shit!

I'd LOVE to quit my job, sell my house and take all of the proceeds to travel around the country by motorcycle taking amazing photographs, talking to interesting people and doing epic things! In the meantime, it looks like I'm going to have to live vicariously through Troy.

Tomorrow morning he sets off on an EPIC journey. It's gonna be just him, his motorcycle and the open road for the next 3 weeks.

He'll be heading out west and then into Canada to visit some family members that have just moved there. At the end of his journey he'll point his mightly metal steed back east for the 2011 BMW Rally.

When he returns at the end of July, I hope he's found safety, adventure, happiness and energizing renewal for his soul.

He's done an amazing job of decking his motorcycle out with some great gear! He has a GPS, XM Satellite radio and a great system that will track his location and make a "mark" every 10 minutes. He's sent me a link so that I can follow him virtually. He also said that he was going to set up a blog to post his photos and adventures as he travels.

I'll be sure to keep you posted should anything EPIC come up!!

Good luck and godspeed, Troy!

Swimming in money like Scrooge McDuck

2011-07-02T23:55:00.000-04:00

Here I am getting my post for NaBloPoMo in at the last second!

So, with just under 1 year left for my second 101 in 1001, I've been checking out my list and trying to figure out what I should tackle next.

On the list is to collect 100,000 pennies and then donate them (or the equivalent $1,000) to a charity. I was doing pretty well for a while because the people on my bowling league (don't judge!) routinely brought me lots of pennies each week.

However, in the last few months, I've gotten behind the schedule of trying to get 100 pennies per day. To be exact, I'm about 35,000 pennies behind schedule. I have already collected well over 30,000 (they are REALLY heavy!), but I am most definitely behind the 70,000 that I should have!

The great thing about pennies is that most people think of them as being virtually useless. That's great when I'm asking them to give me some. Try that with quarters or dollar bills and I'm gonna bet people are a lot less willing to just fork them over. After all, checkout counters don't usually have a Have a Dollar/Take a Dollar cup, do they?

So, here's where I need your help! I'd love to hear your thoughts and ideas on how I can catch up? What are some of the ways you think I could get more pennies from people? Am I missing some obvious plan of attack?

Help! It's for the children!

Let's Swim!

2011-07-01T14:16:00.000-04:00

The for July's NaBloPoMo is SWIM.

What better way to start of a month of blogging (fingers crossed hoping for the best!) and a holiday weekend than to show the world's most adorable baby (others' opinions may differ) ready to go for a swim?

I apologize for the graininess of it, but my brother sent it to me from his phone. It's hard to tell, but she definitely has our family squint going on! Where are her adorable pink sunglasses?! I know she has some!

I made the finals!!

2011-06-28T15:50:00.000-04:00

Last week I shared one of the pillowcases that I made for Carlee and Malynn's charity Pillow Fightover at Ladybird Ln. It was so much fun to make that I ended making a second one with some fat quarters that I had, but I didn't photograph it.

There were some adorable entries and I'm pleased as punch to tell you that I made it to the finals! Woohoo!

Now here's where I need your help! You have until Friday to vote for me (and 2 others that you like). - Yeah, I'm begging you to vote for me. I'm cool like that!

In case you need a reminder, mine is Pillow #9 Raggedy Ann and Andy Pillowcase

Hopefully the voting links will work when you try. If you don't get some sort of confirmation, please let me know.

You can go HERE to vote!!!

Raggedy Ann and Andy Pillowcase

2011-06-22T11:44:00.000-04:00

The lovely ladies over at Ladybird Ln are having a charity event/contest this month and given my recent sewing binge, I thought I'd participate! Their young friend, Malynn (just 14 and having suffered some medical battles) has some mad crazy sewing skills and has decided to put them to good use by making a goal to donate 100 colorful and cheery pillowcases to a Children's Hospital.

Having searched through my own personal fabric stash, I came across a couple of Raggedy Ann and Andy prints that I thought would be perfect for such an occasion!

I didn't really have a pattern, but I figured it only takes a couple of rectangles to make a pillowcase, so it couldn't be that hard! I measured a pillow to find the right dimensions. It just so happened that the blue piece was almost exactly the right size for the main body of the pillow! Score!

I then measured for the ruffly piece I would need as the border of the pillowcase. The white fabric actually had two different Ann and Andy borders on it, so I decided to use those as the border of my pillowcase. With the remaining white fabric, I cut a strip about 3 inches wide by 44 inches long to act as a "ribbon" detail.

As I started to work with the fabric, I could tell I would have to do something about its tendency to fray, so I decided to finish all of the seams using a french seam method, which sounds complicated and fancy, but it's not really.

To make a french seam: 1) Pin your fabric WRONG sides together. 2) Stitch a small (1/4 inch) seam.

3) Turn the fabric wrong sides out and press the seam so that it comes to a sharp edge. 4) Stitch a little bit larger seam (1/2 inch) so that it encases the small seam. When you are finished, you should have no raw edges showing at all which takes care of the problem of any fraying!

After just a few hours, my very cute Raggedy Ann and Andy pillowcase was all finished! I will be sending it off to Malynn for her to include with all of the other pillowcases! I hope that it helps to bring a little comfort and joy to the child who receives it.

It's time to get cracking!

2011-06-22T09:25:00.001-04:00

It's time to get cracking!!

Today is day #706 of 1001, so I have just under 300 days to get really moving in terms of crossing some things off of my 101 in 1001 list!!

To date, I have completed just 15 of my 101 items. Unfortunately I have to remove 2 items from the list (#42. Attend a taping of the Oprah Show - I TRIED to get tickets every chance they had over the last year, but no luck! and #60. I had made several reusable plastic grocery bags using plastic grocery bags, but in my urge to purge, I've gotten rid of most of the extra plastic bags that were laying around. Fabric ones are so much easier to make and last just as long!)

So, if my math is right, that leaves me just about 3 1/2 days PER item to complete the rest of the list!

It's most definitely time to get cracking!

This is where I could really use your help!

I have a few things in the works for the coming months like visiting Rockefeller Center over Christmas this year and planning a trip to stay at the Wigwam Motel.

But if you see an item on the list that you think you can be of help with, give me a shout! Are you a big fan of golfing and want to take me on one of my 10 golf outings? Do you have a huge jar full of pennies and you're looking for a good way to donate them? Do you know of a street fair or a parade that I just shouldn't miss? Do you have a favorite quote that inspires you or a favorite fruit or vegetable that you think I should try?

Whatever it is, if you want to help, I'm willing to accept your help!

Just a word of warning though. I take lots of pictures and I'll brag about you and your good deeds all over the place!

Oh, Vacation, why were you so good to me?

2011-06-07T11:15:00.001-04:00

I'm back from a lovely bit of time off from my 9-5 job.

I spent it cleaning, organizing and spending some quailty time with family and friends. I've got lots of great photos and stories to share, but for now I think I need to slip on my sunglasses, grab a really big cup of coffee and try to take the edge off of "real" work. I think I have a bit of vacation hangover to recover from.

Stay tuned for some fun stuff later this week!

It's Memorial Day weekend! Let's all sing!

2011-05-27T16:00:00.001-04:00

We're on the cusp of Memorial Day weekend and I'm getting ramped up! Won't you join me?!?

This holiday weekend I'll be getting out of Dodge while all the crazies get into town for the race. My brother and his wife are celebrating their birthdays and have a big shindig up at their lake house. It also happens to be the beginning of my first vacation time of the year!

So, how will I be spending my weekend?

First, I think a little quality time with my puppy. She LOVES jumping into the canal downtown, so I'm anxious to see if she love the lake too.

There will also be some camping. It's been AGES since I've been camping and I'm sure it will sound strange to many of you, but I can't wait to break out my gear and use it. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my tent and cot (TOTALLY worth the $217 price tag!!).

I'll most definitely get some baby love!!

But most of all, I will be swimming in some new music that I am head-over-heels, knock-my-socks-off, going-gaga-for in LOVE with. Here's a few of my new favorites (in no particular order):

Christina Perri

This is the first song of hers that I found. Shortly after I heard it, they started playing it on the radio. I'm so ahead of the curve. I'm so cool like that!

This is the latest video from her.

The Civil Wars

Ok, if you can watch end of this video and not FEEL the sexual tension, you need to go check your pulse! NOW!

Excuse me while I go take a cold shower....

Adele

I have SERIOUSLY played this song no less than 100 times in the last week. If you don't believe me, you can just ask my friend Jenny. I swear!

Ok, my job of sharing great music is done for now. Go enjoy and have a wonderful weekend!

Sometimes you just have to put on your Big Girl Panties!

2011-05-27T10:06:00.001-04:00

Although I may be in my mid-thirties, there are way too many times I feel like a petulant teenager and I just want to scream, "You're not the boss of me!"

Most of the time, I have the luxury of doing what I want when I want to do it. If I want to stay up late, I can do it. Eat ice cream for dinner? I can do that too. (I don't recommend it though!) Go for a motorcycle ride instead of washing the sink full of dishes? Yep!!

The problem with this freedom is that left unchecked, you can end up tired, fat and living in a dirty house. Sadly, all of these things are true for me right now.

This bohemian, slacker, hedonistic lifestyles has unfortunately also spilled into my professional life. As an actuary without letters behind my name, I have a LOT of professional exams that need to be passed. I came out of college all gung ho to pass them, but 1) they are HARD to pass and 2) there are way better (more fun) things to be doing on a lovely warm Saturday in August (...insert any other month here!) than studying for an exam!

Fortunately my company and supervisor have been understanding. I may not have letters behind my name, but I do a great job and they don't have to pay me as much as they would otherwise.

But what's good for them is bad for me. I am good at my job and not being paid anywhere near what I should be all because of a few letters!

So, as I quickly careen towards 40, perhaps it's time to realize that sometimes other people really are the boss of me. It's time to get serious. It's time to get paid!

Here's where I need your help. I hate to set goals because most of the time I feel like a failure, but I've set a schedule of exam progress that I'm going to TRY to stick to. If all goes well, I will have letters behind my name by September of 2013. For those of you who don't know much about Actuarial Exams, this may seem like the distant future, but believe me when I tell you it's not!

I'll try to keep you all posted on here, but in the meantime, if you've got some spare prayers you could send up, some words of wisdom or witty quotes to keep me motivated I could really use them. If you know me in real life or just want to leave me a comment, ask me how they are going. I should be making SOME progress each month, so I need to stay accountable!

Most of all, when I tell you to mind your own business or to get off my case, ignore me. When I tell you that you're not the boss of me, remind me that I gave you permission to be the boss of me...for a while anyway.

It's time for some tough love.

I'm off to try on my big girl panties!

A Public Service Announcement.....

2011-05-23T16:55:00.000-04:00

....to all those men who seemingly have more testosterone than brains...

I had a lovely evening last Thursday night. I was supposed to meet some people from church for a ~~excuse to drink beer~~ bible study at a lovely place downtown that had outdoor seating. The night was a perfect temperature, so I couldn't resist riding my motorcycle to the event.

Long story short, no one else showed up (running club, soccer games, etc etc), but I made the best of it by spending the time reading my kindle and enjoying a big iced tea.

When I decided to leave, I gathered up my stuff and headed out to the bike. As I stowed my to-go box in the saddle bag and put on my motorcycle jacket, a man walked up and said (I thought to me), "Nice bike!"

Now there was no one else around the bike, on the sidewalk or otherwise near that could have been mistaken as the owner of my motorcycle and yet this man's response when I said, "Thanks" was......."OH! It's YOUR bike?"

What the eff?

Stopping just short of adding "Jackass" to my response, I said, "Uh, yeah!" With probably more of an attitude than I had intended.

Don't worry. I didn't offend him. Apparently he didn't even notice my annoyed response because he continued his oral blunder by saying "That's an awfully big bike! ....I used to have one a motorcycle with one of those things...." (Uh, a WINDSHIELD?!!?!) "Yeah.. it was good at keeping the bugs off!"

At this point I was beyond annoyed with him and just wanted him to go away. Which he did...eventually...

But then as I'm backing the bike out of the parking space, he has the nerve to come over and say, "Do you need some help?" GET.A.WAY!!! Instead of showing my further disgust, I simply said, "No, I'm fine. Thank you."

I don't want to sound ungrateful or like a shrew and I wish I could say this was the first/last time I have had this conversation with a man like this. But, alas, it is not.

So, here is my advice to all of those would-be-men......

When you're about to approach a woman on a motorcycle, PLEASE think before you open your mouth. This is the 21st century. More and more of us are riding our own bikes and no longer relegated to be the "bitch" on the back. If you see us stopped in a parking lot or gas station and you want to talk to us, starting out a conversation by questioning our ability to ride (ie, Is that YOUR bike?!? Did you ride it all the way here?!?) is not advised. Instead, take a moment to think of a clever/witty/insightful query.

For example, you could be curious: "How do you like the way this bike handles?"
You could be sincere: "I really admire a woman who rides. How long have you been riding?"
You could be funny: "Hey, could I be the bitch on the back?"
You could be cheeky: "I love a woman who knows how to tame a beast."

But, gentleman, whatever you do, please stop being neaderthals.

It's one of those months.

2011-05-17T16:25:00.000-04:00

Do you ever have one of those days (weeks/months/years)?

Those days when it seems all you touch turns to crap?
Those days when the only thing around the corner are more corners?
Those days when making the decision to get out of bed was clearly a mistake?

Oh yeah....it's been one of those ~~days~~ months.

It's been one of those months when I'm actually AFRAID to ask what else could go wrong...because it probably will.

A short list of:

The mundane

* All I've wanted to do lately is sew. Seriously. I could be locked up in a room with fabric, a sewing machine and sewing supplies and I could be a happy camper for a LONG time. Unfortunately because of the events of the last few weeks, there's not a whole lot of sewing going on at my house. The machine just mocks me from the corner of the room.

* Due to the amount of rain we've had and the fact that my "lawn service" is at college, my front yard has become a jungle. The dandelions are so long they could be mistaken for small trees. I feel like "that house" in the neighborhood and I'm certain the people who are trying to sell their house across the street are NOT pleased.

The annoying

* I was a really smart kid growing up. How is that a bad thing? Because I never had to study in school. Consequently when I got to college (when things matter!), I skimmed by with mostly Bs, some Cs and a smattering of As. In the grand scheme of things that wouldn't seem so bad. Except now I am paying the consequences of my slacking. I have to spend time and money on continuing education credits to get letters behind my name in the form of a professional designation all because I got a C in a couple of classes in college instead of a B-. The price tag: about $2000.

* My dog got a UTI and had to have her annual shots all at once. The price tag has been over $300.

* On Easter Sunday as I prepared to leave my parents' house (100+ miles from my house), my dad discovered a bubble in the sidewall of my tire. After limping back home, I was told by the repair shop that because there was a ding in the rim of the tire, I must have hit something so the repair wouldn't be covered. The price tag to replace the tire: $100.

The catastrophic

* Apparently my electric company switched me to electronic billing and the bills went to my junk mail. I came home a week ago and the electricity had been turned off! Nothing remotely like this has ever happened to me. Yes, I should have kept track of WHICH bills I'd paid, but when a bill comes in, I pay it. End of story. ARGH The price tag: $300.

* I came home 4 weeks ago, started down the steps to my basement and was horrifed to discover no less than 5 inches of standing water. There are fewer sights more blooding curdling. The price tag: I don't even want to think about it!!

So, while I would like to start enjoying my summer, instead, I will be ripping (moldy) drywall out of my basement dressed in attire resembling a hazmat suit. I will also register (and pay for) and study for online courses this summer while the weather is gorgeous and the motorcycle riding should be good!

.........................

And don't get me started on all the ways I've failed my blog family. I've been MIA for weeks. (I SWEAR there some excellent posts floating around in my head!) I was going to try to blog every day this month, but that seriously didn't happen! I could say I'll try to do better, but don't they say to under promise and over deliver?

Maybe things will look better tomorrow, right?

I'm off to take some meds.

Song Time Sunday

2011-04-03T09:46:00.000-04:00

As I think of the things that I want to write about in the coming weeks, I bring you a prelude of posts to come:

I do so love finding artists that are virtually unknown by the general public. The problem with that is that they are usually not from here, so seeing them in concert can be difficult if not impossible. A couple of years ago I had a chance to see Missy Higgins in concert at a small venue here in Indianapolis, but I couldn't find someone to go with me, so I didn't go. I STILL kick myself about that and that is NOT a mistake I will make again!

Maybe if others here in "the states" know about this Aussie, she'll venture over here again.

Check her out!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCLERYzJsYA

Lyrics to "Where I Stood"

I don't know what I've done

Or if I like what I've begun

But something told me to run

And honey, you know me

It's all, or none

There were sounds in my head

A little voice is whispering

That I should go, and this should end

But then I found myself listening

Cuz I don't know, who I am, who I am without you

All I know is that I should

And I don't know if I could stand, another hand upon you,

All I know is that I should

Cuz she will love you more than I could

She who dares to stand where I stood

See I thought love was black and white

if it was wrong, or it was right

But you aint leaving without a fight and I think I am just as torn inside

Cuz I don't know, who I am, who I am without you

All I know is that I should

And I don't know if I could stand, another hand upon you,

All I know is that I should

Cuz she will love you more than I could

She who dares to stand where I stood

And I wont be far from where you are if ever you should call

You meant more to me than anyone I ever loved at all

But you taught me how to trust myself

And so I say to you...

This is what I have to do

Cuz she will love you more than I could

She who dares to stand where I stood

You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone

2011-04-02T08:00:00.042-04:00

I am not crazy. Trust me. I know that our pets are not kids.

But for me, Sasha is the closest I may get to having a child of my own (somewhat sad, I know). When I got her a few years ago as a puppy, I made sure that I carved out time to spend bonding with her, training her and just making sure she was a great addition to my household.

One of the best things I feel like I ever did for her was to get her micro-chipped. Yes, Marion County requires that you microchip your pets, but I did it for the peace of mind. If she ever runs away or gets out, it may not keep her from getting injured, but if somebody is able to get a hold of her, it may help them make sure she gets back to me.

It's a REALLY tiny microchip (about the size of a grain of rice). It's also a simple procedure that takes just a second for a qualified person to do.

So, if you're in central Indiana and want to have your pet microchipped, today only the Indianapolis Humane Society is offering low-cost microchipping from 10 AM to 2 PM. For a minimum donation of just $7, your furry child can be microchipped! If you can put a price on the love that comes from those wet nose-nuzzles, let's just say $7 is a STEAL, folks!

Hugs,
Heather

The Ultimate Blog Party

2011-04-01T11:49:00.001-04:00

It's been a while since I shared any of my adventures in crossing things off of my list and that is simply a shame! I've also been a bit remiss in blogging the last couple of months AND I keep promising to update you on several things about projects, my thoughts and feelings on a variety of subjects and ALL of the things that have been going on personally for me.

Well! That's enough procrastinating for me! As they say, if you want shade, when is the best time to plant a tree? 40 years ago! When is the second best time? TODAY! So, I'm gonna give it a shot to blog every day this month (#4 on the list!) and share some of what's been going on with me this month! There are several projects that I'm just DYING to show you!

So let's get this party started...literally! The ladies over at 5 Minutes for Mom are throwing the Ultimate Blog Party (2011 edition!) and you're all invited!

I may not be a mom, but I'm really looking forward to visiting some new blogs and I can't wait to hear from you all. You know I LOVE me some comments! So head on over there and see what they've got going on! And if you're visiting here for the first time, welcome! I'm so happy to meet you.

Hugs,

Heather

Edit:

Apparently I have not done my little post here quite right.

I never introduced myself! I can be so rude like that. Please forgive.

My name is Heather and I have been blogging on since 2007. My blog started as a way to document all of my wonderful adventures completing my first 101 in 1001 list. For those of you who haven't heard of it, it's basically a bucket list with a deadline. You make a list of 101 things that you want to do and you try to get them done in 1001 days. That's about 2 years and 9 months for those of you who don't want to do the math! That list ended in July of 2009 and now I'm on list #2!

I don't think the bags under my eyes are really that bad. Hopefully I just needed some sleep!

I'm in my 30s, single, no kids and living the dream! Well, maybe not, but I do try to get the most out of each day of my life because there have been too many times in my life that I didn't do something and then later thought, "What if?" So I try to be honest and open with people and I make sure that the people around me know that I love them because everybody needs to know somebody cares.

I write rant about life in general and more specifically motorcycling (been riding my own since 2005!), my family and friends (names are changed to protect the innocent and not-so-innocent!), the cutest dog in the world (Sasha) and things that make me go "hmmm".

I hope you enjoy what you read because most of the time I love writing about it. If you do, make sure you Follow me and if you leave a comment, I'll be over to your page lickety-split!

Lent Day 8: A new life for old t-shirts

2011-03-16T21:12:00.000-04:00

I talked a little bit yesterday about how much more I've been able to get done around my house since I'm not spending my time playing video/online games. Well, the trend of checking off items from my list continues!

A few months (egad!) I cleaned out my t-shirt drawer when I found it was difficult to put the clean ones away. What's up with t-shirts? I swear they multiply like rabbits! Do a charity event - get a t-shirt! Win a contest - get a t-shirt! They are everywhere! Anywooo...

I hardly ever actually wear t-shirts (long story starting when I was younger - a garment with writing on it displayed on the chest of a VERY self-conscious well-endowed teenage girl. ugh!). So I cleaned out my t-shirt drawer and got rid of quite a few of some of the ones that were torn or stained, etc. The problem is that there were a few of them that I really liked because of what they said or where they came from. What's a girl to do? I know! Make some t-shirt grocery bags! Yay! I didn't do a tutorial because there are TONS of them out there and really, it's such an easy thing. With a little sewing knowledge, it can be done in just a few simple steps!

1) Cut each of the sleeves off at the joining seam.
2) Turn the shirt inside out and stitch the opening at the bottom together.
3) Lay the shirt flat and use a bowl to trace a larger opening around the neck.
4) Turn it right-side out and you're done!

(I took some ~~crappy~~ ok photos of them, but I'll have to add them later since I forgot to upload them. Oops!)

I'm looking forward to even more sewing in the next few weeks. I'll keep you posted on my progress and take some better pictures this time!

Lent Day 7: Newfound time!

2011-03-15T21:36:00.001-04:00

The other day I told you that I had given up playing video/online games for Lent. I was sure it would be a struggle for me to do because they are sort of habit for me. If I want to relax, I play. If I am feeling stressed, I play. If I am bored, I play. I definitely think it could be considered an addiction of sorts.

The first few days I think it was sort of like going through withdrawal. After the initial sort of "what do I do now?" feeling, I got busy! I have a huge Pottery Barn chalkboard in my kitchen covered with my To Do list. It a list of just SOME of the things that I feel like I need to do/fix/clean around my house. That list has been there for ages with little action taken on the items because of my "lack of time". Well, guess what I found! Loads and loads of time that I was simply wasting on video games!

I used to feel like I hardly any time in the evening after working a full time job all day. That's not the case this week! On Monday night, I organized some of my Ebay items (more to come on that later) so that I could list some more things in the coming days.

Tonight, I FINALLY checked a big item off of my list!

I don't have a pantry. In fact, I ENVY people who do. Instead, I bought a couple of bookcases from Ikea and made my own makeshift pantry. I'm not thrilled that they are open and don't have doors (I like to keep things tidy behind doors), but I am making do. So, with all of my newfound time, I spent about an hour and cleaned out my cupboards, chucked out of date items, cleaned shelves and put everything back all neat and tidy ala "Sleeping With the Enemy". (All of the labels have to face out). It's not done yet, but at least I've made some progress!

Lent is 40 days long, so I'm looking forward to get some more things crossed off of that big chalkboard!

Lent Day 6: Madison Monday

2011-03-14T00:23:00.001-04:00

I have completely fallen down on my job of posting about my niece, Madison! Luckily, a few weeks ago I was able to spend some quality time with the little munchkin while my brother and his wife were away. She is such a cutie and so even-tempered most of the time! Right now she is trying to get some teeth and over the weekend that I was there she was doing her darnedest to get some forward momentum and actually crawl. A few days later my brother said she had finally succeeded and she hasn't stopped since then!

Beware! Madison is on the move!! Today: crawling. Tomorrow: the world!!

I apologize about the quality of the video here, but it was taken with my cell phone and I'm working on finding a better video source so that I can post on here. Until then, enjoy Madison's world internet premiere!

Lent Day 5: Do you know where your pew is?

2011-03-13T16:01:00.013-04:00

I don't talk much about my faith or church life on here because 1) while this blog is about MANY thing, it isn't about that and 2) my faith life is a private thing between God and me. I grew up in the church and went to a parochial (church) school until I went to college and in that time I witnessed a lot of people who claimed they were Christians on Sunday, but lived a life that professed otherwise the rest of the week. So instead of speaking about it, I prefer to let my life be a witness to others about my faith.

...but that is not what I'm here to talk about today. No, today I'm here to talk about where I sit in church. Now that my seem like a mundane subject, but I don't think it is.

You see, growing up in the church my parents still attend, we ALWAYS sat in the same pew. There was nothing special about that pew and there weren't assigned seats or anything, but I guess we, like many others, were creatures of habit. To this day, as far as I know, my Mom stills sits there. My dad never did, but that's another entry for a different subject on a different day.

Other "regulars" had their pews as well and you could always tell who was/wasn't at church simply by checking out "their" pew.

Then when I started dating Troy 7+ years ago and I started going to "his" church, we didn't always sit in the exact same pew, but at least in the same 5 foot radius of one particular area. I never really said anything about it and didn't really have an issue with it at the time, but over the last few months while attending the church alone, I've noticed a few things. First, that particular spot is under the balcony, so the sounds of the choir or congregation singing aren't great. I'm also certain that the amazing pipe organ could be heard better from a different location. It's also near the back of the church which makes seeing events like baptisms and soloists who are at the front more difficult to witness.

So, the last few weeks I've been "experimenting" with where I sit. I've been trying to figure out which location suits me the best where I feel like I can be involved at the level I want to be involved and get the most out of my Sunday morning pew time. I know this is going to sound odd, but at 30-something this is the first time I've actually asked MYSELF where I want to sit. It seems such a simple thing on it's surface, but I think it speaks volumes to how, up until now, I've not been honoring myself, my needs or the needs of my soul.

As I go through the next week, I'm hoping to remember to honor myself and the needs of my soul and to try to find "my pew" in every situation.

Lent Day 4: Song Time Saturday

2011-03-12T15:14:00.019-05:00

It's Saturday and I'm feeling a bit frazzled, so I decided to listen to some music (and then share it with you!) to quiet my soul. Here is one of my "go-to" songs lately. It's called "I Don't Ever Give Up" by Patti Griffin and makes me feel a little bit better about things.

There are some days I don't think I'd make it through without a little melodic therapy. How about you? Are there songs that speak to your soul? Can music change your mood?

Here are the lyrics to "I Don't Ever Give Up" by Patti Griffin:

"I Don't Ever Give Up"

I'm no kid in a kid's game

I did what I did, I've got no one to blame

But I don't give up, no, I don't ever give up

It's all I've got, it's my claim to fame

I'm no fighter but I'm fighting

This whole world seems uninviting

But I don't give up, no, I don't ever give up

I fall down sometimes, sometimes I come back flying

Liars are lying, airplanes are flying

Love isn't here, love isn't here

But it's somewhere

Time to forget me, but something won't let me

Love isn't here, love isn't here

But it's somewhere

And I cleaned and I washed up

This dream I don't ever give up

I don't ever give up, I don't ever give up

No, I don't ever give up, no, I don't ever give up

No, I don't ever give up, I don't ever give up

Lent Day 3: A day for counting blessings

2011-03-11T23:58:00.000-05:00

As tears and anguish take place half a world away and Japan wakes up to the devistation wrought by the earthquake and tsunami, I feel it's time to count my blessings. I know I often use this as a platform for griping, but I would just like to say how fortunate I feel to be surrounded by loving friends and family who are healthy and safe. As I crawl into my nice warm bed this evening, I sent out thoughts and prayers to all those who are not so fortunate. I wish for them peace amidst the storm and the loving arms of God wrapped around them.

Lent Day 2: Share the love

2011-03-11T00:11:00.000-05:00

So, spring is right around the corner and you're dreaming of spending some time out in the glorious weather. Do you know who else likes to spend time running around and playing out in the bright shiny sun? Shelter dogs!

And you're in luck! There are some amazing dogs at the Indianapolis Humane Society right now. Since it's on my list (more on that later), I've been volunteering there spending time playing and walking dogs. I try my best to remember that my job is to pet/walk/just spend time with the doggies so that they remember that they are meant to be with people so that when the right person comes into adopt them, they will make an excellent addition.

The thing about shelter dogs is they are faced with the same struggle to find love that I battle. If they aren't cute, sweet and cuddly looking, they are probably just gonna get passed by because nobody is taking the time to judge them on more than just the size of their body and the lie of their fur.

So, I'm gonna try to get a few of those doggies a bit more attention in hopes that they will find their "forever home" very soon.

My first little lover is Beauty. As a gorgeous 9-month-old Black Labrador Retriever, she certainly lives up to her name! If you're looking for an energetic, intelligent lover, (and aren't we all!) you most definitely would not go wrong with this pretty girl. She does well playing with other dogs and we spent most of our time alternating between her playing with the treats I gave her and her leaning into me while she soaking in my petting her. If she sounds as amazing as she is and you're interested in making her part of your family, you can check out how she can be yours by visiting her page here.

Our next sweetie is Blu. He may look tough, but he's a real softie. He has a strong, beautiful Pit Bull head and body! He's not yet available for adoption because he's heartworm positive and The Humane Society is seeking sponsorship for his treatment, but I just know he will make an excellent companion once he's all better. If his rugged good looks have you interested in bringing him home or you'd like to help with his medical treatment, you can find all that information here.

Finally, the dog who won my heart recently is Buck. When I read the description on his kennel, I wasn't sure that I wanted to try to handle him. He was nearly 70 pounds, he was a tall dog (his back reached my hips) and the description said that although he was housebroken, he needed to work on his manners. The translation I've gleened from that in the past is that "bad manners" equals nearly no training and REALLY bad behavior (ie, jumping up, trying to bite, etc etc). In the case of this dog, that is most definitely false advertising!! Yes, he's a big dog at nearly 70 pounds, but he's so thin you can easily count all of his ribs. He's definitely strong, but responded well to my guiding him on the leash without too much pulling. He tried to jump up on me once, but after I told him to get down, that didn't happen anymore. I always grab a handful of dog treats and once he discovered I had those, he showed himself to be a truly intelligent dog! When I asked him to sit, his butt hit the ground immediately. When I asked him to "stay" and I walked away with the treat in my hand, he didn't move a muscle until he was released by me to get his treat. I'd hate to see this wonderful dog get passed over because of his reported "bad manners." One warning, he's definitely got some slobber going on when you give him treats! So if this gentle giant seems like a good fit for you, you can check him out at the Indianapolis Humane Society on North Michigan road in Indianapolis or go here for more information on how to bring him into your family.

Don't live in the Indianapolis area? Check out the shelter near you for a new best friend because shelter dogs are sometimes the best dogs!!

Lent Day 1

2011-03-10T00:05:00.000-05:00

So, today is Ash Wednesday, which is the beginning of Lent and while I'm not Catholic, I do try to give up one thing and add another as a way of daily "worshipping". In the past I've given up chocolate (ugh!) and soda (eh), but this year I decided to make a real sacrifice! I've given up.....video games! GASP!

For anyone who knows the Facebook addiction that is "Frontierville", you'll understand my pain.

I've read that people who play video games often feel like they are not competent or in control and in the world of the video game, you are the master! Whether you're baking cakes, serving customers, or planting crops, you're in charge. You can plant 100 crops and earn a badge! The more badges you get, the "better" you are, right?

But the problem with these games is that they aren't real life. They can take us away from fulfilling goals, spending quality time with friends and family or even cleaning out that spare bedroom you've been meaning to get to. So over the next 40 days, I look forward to checking some of those things off of my To Do list that have been lingering on there for far too long.

I also look forward to getting back in touch with all of you. I've been uninspired to "put it all out there" on here over the last couple of months, but it's time to get back on the horse. After all, you all are wonderful and there's nothing so cleansing to ones soul as getting things off of your chest and onto "paper". In addition, perhaps I'll even get to some of the posts that I've been stewing about far too long.

Until tomorrow, go with God.

They call it "poker" because ... someone has to get poked.

2011-01-18T13:47:00.000-05:00

As some of you may know, I run a monthly poker game. It's very small stakes, but generally speaking it's a good time. I started playing in this particular game back in 2005 when it was hosted by someone else after I broke my arm (crashed my motorcycle - ouch!) and couldn't go to my regular bowling league. It was made up of mostly Troy's friends (all men) and I have to say that when I started playing I was quite intimidated. I had never played before and I was the only woman in attendance, but as I said, it was very small stakes, so it was a great way to learn the game.

Over the next few years I became a regular attendee and in late 2008, the host decided to give up the game. After some discussions about where we might move it, I volunteered to have it at my house. I really have the perfect "man cave" if I wanted to deck it out (and if I was a man). It's the back room of my house that has tall ceilings, a big screen TV and a poker table I since made for the game. Basically the once-a-month poker game is the only time this room gets much use.

Although I inherited the game and its guest list, the attendees have changed a bit in the interim. You know how it is - people drop out for a bit, others hear about the game and get added to the list, etc etc. So a little over a year ago, we were going through a transitional period and decided to get some new blood involved.

One of the new people (we'll call him Mr. A.) was a friend of one of the regulars, but I swear from the moment he walked in, we were like oil and water. I like to run a tight game (show up on time, don't splash the pot, pay attention to the action if you're in the hand and try to obey some basic poker ettiquite). It's my house and I didn't feel like I was asking too much. After all, we'd all been going along fine for a couple of years without any complaints or issues.

Let me interject here for just a moment....an aside, if you will....These are generally great guys, but they are guys and have those "guy" genes.... You know the ones that give them the ability to have selective hearing and an inability to put the seat down.

Anyway... From the moment Mr. A. stepped in, apparently all of my rules were seemingly ridiculous to him. I would (nicely) remind him REPEATEDLY not to splash the pot and to keep his cards to himself when there were other people still in the hand. Also, when the "blinds" haven't been put out appropriately, I would gently remind them (ALL the guys at some point - NOT just Mr. A.) to blind up. The problem it seems when I was NICELY or gently saying something, was that somehow my voice was out of the range of their selective hearing. Consequently, by the third time I would say something, it seemed like I was yelling.

Among the other things that Mr. A. (who was also a chauvenist) would do that drove me insane would be to completely ignore that I was IN a hand. Now, it's not like I was hiding my cards, so if he had simply paid attention, this wouldn't have been an issue.

So, finally, after 18 months or so of biting my tongue (sort of - I can be a bit cheeky at the game. It IS poker, ya know), I had had it and let him have it in December. After being ignored for the bazillionth time, I got mad and told him so. It was a great release to me and apparently didn't seem like a big deal to the other guys at the game, but Mr. A. apparently took exception to it. When I sent out the evite for the January game, his response was clear that he would no longer be in attendance at any of "my" games. I then heard it through the grapevine that he decided to stop coming because .......wait for it.......

I was MEAN to him.

Seriously? Wow! If only I could use my power for good rather than evil.

I could dwell on this and be concerned that I had alienated someone (this is the thing I would generally do in the past) and bend over backward to get him back to the game even though I don't actually want him there. But no. That's not part of Heather Version 2011. After all, as I said in one of my recent posts, I am not responsible for the happiness or unhappiness of others.

Instead, I will try to put out good thoughts into the universe and open up his spot to whoever it is that the universe things should fill it.

Madison Monday 1/17/2011

2011-01-17T12:39:00.000-05:00

I will probably never have any children of my own.

Saying this, even virtually, brings a tightness to my chest and a lump in my throat.

I often wonder how many more times I will have to think or say it before I will numb to the notion of it.

I never imagined myself with a brood of children running all around me, but I never pictured myself with no children either. I guess I just always thought I'd have plenty of time.

Funny thing about time. It, like an ice cream cone on a hot summer day, goes a lot more quickly than we expect it to.

But instead of thinking of what might have been, I will instead relish what is. That sweet little niece of mine with that brilliant smile, who, in spite of not coming from me still shares some of my idiosyncrasies.

When she, like me, doesn't want to go to sleep at night because the world is an amazing thing full of wonders to behold, I hold her and rock her and assure her that it will all still be there for her to explore when she wakes in the morning.

Madison Monday

2011-01-06T16:17:00.001-05:00

For those of you who were regular readers, I was absent for quite a while towards the end of 2010. LOTS of things happened and I will go into those at some point when I feel like the time is right, but one of the biggest additions to my life was my niece, Madison! I know there are TONS of Mommy bloggers out there, but I'm not sure how many Auntie Bloggers there are. I think it's time for me to become one of the first. I plan to do this in a little segment I call Madison Mondays!!

I don't live in the same city as the squirt, but because of modern technology I am usually graced with pictures of her via text message several times a week. Yay!

So, if you don't wanna see all her baby goodness, check back here on Tuesday every week. In the meantime, here's an array of photos of Miss Sweetness herself from birth to 4 months.

The formula for a new year

2011-01-06T15:37:00.001-05:00

It's a New Year! It's as close to a fresh start as the perfectionist in me feels like I can get! There something very exciting about a new calendar blank and fresh with possibilities!

I'm not a huge fan of New Year's Resolutions really. I feel like they are just a way to set myself up for failure. The perfectionist in me often uses any slip up when it comes to resolutions as a way of giving up. In some ways, it's an easy out. But this year, maybe I'll make an exception. After all, I can't really become a new me without doing some things differently, can I?

I've been giving this some thought for a little while and I've come up with a few things to start the launch of Heather 2.0. I'm sure these things will be tweaked throughout the year, but this is what I have to start:

* I will remember that I am not responsible for the happiness or unhappiness of others. It is not my intention to bring sadness or pain to other people, but when their need for me to say "Yes" conflicts with my need to say "No", one of us has to be disappointed and for too long, it has been me. That sounds horrible, but it's actually a way of being kinder.

* Every day I will do things that show and reinforce that I love myself. These things includes, but are not limited to:
     * Getting enough sleep.
     * Getting enough exercise.
     * Eating the things that will keep me healthy and energized.
     * Taking my medication(s) daily as prescribed.
     * Saying "No" when "Yes" would detrimental to my well-being.
     * Forgiving myself when I inevitably fail to do any of these things.

It probably doesn't seem like very many resolutions right now, but they, as I am also, are a work in progress. Besides it doesn't do any good to give away all my secrets right away, does it?

Ever have one of those days?

2011-01-06T15:12:00.001-05:00

I know I can't be the only one. I know we all have THOSE days. Here is a brief look into my day:

*) I take a look at my checking account online and there's a lot less money in there than I remember having.
*) I remember that it's the time of year when I get my annual review, so there is a glimmer of hope.
*) I remember that last year I didn't get a raise because "times were tough", so another beam of light shines hopeful for me.
*) The boss calls me in for the review and explains that, once again, I won't be getting a raise because I didn't have enough billable hours to warrent one.
*) I explain to him that throughout last year I continually went to him during my down time to explain that I didn't have a lot to do. After all, he's responsible for bringing in business. I'm simply responsible for getting the work done.
*) He says, "Yeah. Still can't do anything for you."

Let me just interject here. I am SOOO thankful to have a job at a time when so many do not. I am just miffed that the actuary profession as a whole is not very good at keeping equality of the sexes in mind when paying their employees. I also don't have all of the letters behind my name that I want. As a result, I am seriously underpaid.

*) Luckily for me, there are people out there who are willing to help me out during these time. (Thanks Mom and Dad!)
*) The old me would have stewed about this for a couple of days. The new me is starting to study and spending every possible moment doing billable work.

Now if only I can avoid feeling like a loser because I had to ask my parents to help me financially.

On the bright side, this is a new year and there's always tomorrow.

....Now back to that billable time!

Polar Bear Ride 2011

2011-01-05T15:16:00.001-05:00

So many things have changed in my life since last year (more on that later, I swear!). For 2011, I want to shake off the old and create a whole new. New what? Me? Life? Outlook? YES! I want to redefine who I am, what I want from life and how I can make the places I inhabit better every day. It's a tall order, I know, but I think I'm up to the challenge!

So, how do I kick off the new year if I want a new me? I step out of my comfort zone! In this case, I stepped WAAY out of my comfort zone! And I have to say, I was richly rewarded by the experience!

When I started riding my motorcycle 6 years ago, I participated in a "Hangover Rally" with Troy on January 1st, 2005. It was my first rally ever and quite an experience. It was a balmy 50 degrees that year (balmy for January in Indiana, anyway!) and the group of riders that were on the poker run and at the rally were definitely not the type of riders I hang with now, but it was a great time anyway.

This year, I decided to up the ante. A local group of riders that I've sort of been stalking on Meetup.com was planning a Polar Bear ride starting at Monument Circle in downtown Indy. This sounded like an interesting event and although I'd never met any of the group and didn't have anyone who was going to ride with me, I decided to give it a go! All week long before the January 1st ride, the weathermen kept calling for great weather (in the 50s) on Saturday, January 1st. The more they forecasted, the more excited I got about the possibility of an off-season ride! So, after a gorgeous day near 60 on Friday, December 31st, I prepped my bike for the ride the next afternoon.

Cut to Saturday, January 1st. Ahem....the 50 degree temps? No sign of them! At about 10:30 on Saturday morning I checked the forecast and it was a bit bleak to say the least. The high for the day was going to be about 39 and it would be dropping to near freezing around 5 PM. My first instinct was to scrap the whole thing. After all, it would be a much nicer day all warm and cozy in my house, right?

But wait! No! 2011 is about a new me and trying new things! How could I start that off right if I just stayed home? After all the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result, right? I may be crazy, but I'm not insane YET! So I threw caution to the wind and piled on another layer of clothing as I set out on my motorcycle headed for downtown Indy.

Now, I only live about 6 miles from the circle, but I have to say it's a LONG 6 miles when the temps are low enough to see your breath.

Upon my arrival, I spotted my riding partners and they were a motley looking crew! I was younger than them by a good 20 years and, oh yeah, I was a girl!

After a few moments of some awkward glances (you'd think these middle aged men clad in black leather had never seen a girl dressed in pink ride a motorcycle!), I introduced myself to the group and was instantly accepted as one of their own.

The goal for the day was to ride 1 mile for each degree of temperature. It was assumed that each rider traveled about 10 miles to get there and 10 miles to get home (lucked out on that one!), so we rode a little less than 10 miles to a small pub near the Indianapolis Motor Speedway where we ate, drank loads of hot coffee to warm ourselves up and enjoyed some great conversation getting to know one another. After a few hours, we departed company and headed home.

The riders I spent the afternoon with were not people I would have necessarily been inclined to talk to, but that made the day all the better. I had a wonderful time getting to know them and I was proud of myself that I stepped out of my comfort zone and hopefully made steps toward a new me in 2011.

A Happy New Year!

2011-01-05T15:09:00.001-05:00

Despite my apparent (2 1/2 month) absence (eek!), I'm not really gone. My house has been a crazy place and I've been feeling beyond overwhelmed, so I checked out for a bit.

But now I'm back and energized to start fresh. After all, if 1/1/11 isn't a great day to begin anew, I don't know when is. So stay tuned in the next couple of days for my plans to tackle the new year as a new woman with a new outlook!

I promise there will be excitement, intrigue, colossal screw-ups and maybe even some web-camming (if I can get that silly thing figured out!).

For those of you who have stuck with me, thanks so much!

We interrupt our regular broadcasting schedule

2010-10-15T02:48:00.000-04:00

I'm doing something a little different today. I know this blog is about oh so many things, but, generally speaking, I don't really show much of the creative things that I do. Even though I scrapbook, crochet, knit, sew, etc etc etc, I guess I feel like there are so many great crafty blogs out there that I don't really share much of that side of me.

But...I'm making an exception today. Tam over at Sew Dang Cute (such a cute blog name and an incredible blog as well!) is having a contest for crafters in the blog world! It just so happened that I was halfway through creating my project when I found out about the contest, so it was perfect!

This summer I got a new sewing machine. My old one was a gift from my mom 20 years ago for my 16th birthday (yikes!) and had been well-loved and well-used. But, alas, it went to sewing machine heaven. I replaced it with a new machine made by Pfaff and I LOVE it. I love it so much that I am just making up things just so that I can sew. I don't have any children of my own, but this summer I made a ton of baby blankets for my new niece and a friend's nephew.

This fall, the sewing inspiration hit and I decided to make a halloween costume for my friend's 1-year-old. After having two boys, she is loving have a little girl and she absolutely dotes on her little "love bug." Since that's what she calls her, we decided to go with the idea of a love bug for the costume.

I don't have a tutorial because I just sort of made it up as I went along, but I'll do my best to describe what I did. The only part of the costume that I had a pattern for was the onesie. I made it out of a really soft brown knit and I was thrilled with the way that it turned out because I've never sewn with a knit. I'd also never used the sort of snaps that go on the crotch portion of a onesie, so it was amazing that it turned out so well (even if I do say so myself!)

For the skirt, I wanted to use a pink fabric with brown polka dots, but since I couldn't find the right fabric, I decided to applique the polka dots onto the skirt. This was the first time I've appliqued as well and I was so pleased with the dots. They certainly aren't going to come off of the skirt! As far as the shape of the skirt, I knew the baby's waist size and just sort of did a rough sketch and it poofs out at the right angle just perfectly! I then used some of the brown fabric to make a waistband and my bias tape maker for the edging on the bottom of the skirt. I think it gives it a really finished look.

For the tutu portion of the costume, I simply cut strips of tulle and tied them around a piece of elastic. It was easy peasy and sooo cute!

I TRIED to make the wings myself, but after several failed attempts at bending the wire perfectly, I opted for a pair of dollar store butterfly wings. I think they work just perfectly and were a very economical choice.

Finally, the headband that she's wearing will have two little ears attached to them. I would have attached them for the pictures, but my model had skipped her nap and had an ear infection, so I was working on borrowed time to get her into the outfit and snap a few pictures. (Hence, the death grip on the bottle!)

On Halloween night, her outfit will be completed with some brown tights and shoes. I can hardly wait to share those photos. She is such a cutie patootie, don'tcha think?

So, if you get a chance, drop on over to Sew Dang Cute and check out the rest of the contest entries. While you're there, let'em know how much you adore the little love bug!

Thanks!!

Things that are worse than unmet expectations - lowered expectations

2010-10-05T15:25:00.000-04:00

So, having not committed suicide, I decided to instead commit to making a real effort in my dating life upon returning home after my brother's wedding.

I decided to really buckle down and give this thing a go! I swear I tried everything and looked everywhere for Mr. Right. I hunted down hotties at the grocery. I gave God's house a go. Much of the time I came up heart-wrenchingly empty-handed. Whatever it was that I needed (skill, swagger) to "turn some heads", I was clearly not equipped with. The only numbers I was giving out at the grocery store were the ones stamped on my debit card.

Not getting the results that I desired through conventional means, I ventured out into cyberspace. Back in those days online-dating was in its infancy and for the most part, it was still populated by those who were less than successful in meeting people in "real life". Most of the time, if a couple met via the internet back then, they had to get their "how we met" story straight. After all, no self-respecting person would admit to finding "real" love via virtual means.

So I joined Match.com and chatted with more than enough guys online to be able to fairly quickly sort the testosterone-filled wheat from the chaff. It's also where I developed some very basic tests for determining if I would even respond to an email from a would-be beau. For instance, if he didn't know when to appropriately use "there and their" or "your and you're", he was clearly not going to make the grade. It may seem a bit picky, but there had to be SOME sort of process for culling the herd!

After all, in cyberspace I was a regular hottie. I was witty and charming. I could talk on a wide range of subjects and I laughed at all of their (sometimes horrible) jokes. (What I lacked in self-respect I more than made up for in self-loathing. {sigh})

This is the way things generally went in my online-dating life: 1) Guy would find my profile online and send me an email. 2) I would respond to his email and wait with baited breath for his response. 3) We would converse like this for a week or more before he would suggest we could talk by phone. 4) Phone conversations back and forth would proceed for another week or so before he would eventually ask me out on a "real life" date. 5) We would go on said date and then, inevitably, 6) all communication would end. Rinse. Wash. Repeat.....

Even after the 10th or so time of this happening, it was simply emotionally devastating for me. The worst part was always the deafening silence of the phone in the weeks following those dates. The only thing worse than NOT receiving a phone call when he said "I'll call you," were some of the other responses I received:

* "I had a rough break-up and I don't think I'm really ready to date yet." - Apparently he recovered quickly because he was messaging other women just days after telling me this.
* "I think I'm going to try to get back with my ex-girlfriend." - Apparently she didn't take him back because, once again, he was online chatting with other women just days later.
* "Well, I called you ANYWAY." - said to me after a brief lunch date with a man that I wouldn't have dated if you had paid me. He was telling me this because, in his opinion, I was below HIS standards!

I can MAYBE understand this sort of out and out rejection if I had, in any way, lied or misled them about who I was or how I looked. But I hadn't. I always posted an accurate, up-to-date photo of myself (more than I could say for many of them). I was always up front about what I looked like. I was always honest about who I was. Besides, I may have never deluded myself into thinking that I was beautiful, but I don't think the self-loathing brought on by their behaviour was warranted either.

Stay tuned for the misery that is speed-dating and turning over a new leaf.

More on unmet expectations

2010-09-30T16:35:00.002-04:00

So, in 1997, my younger brother told me he was going to ask his girlfiend to marry him. For the next 18 months, I swear the wedding and all of the planning that goes along with it was the ONLY thing that was discussed by my family any time we spoke on the phone or were in the same room. God love them, I know they were excited about it, but by the month before the wedding, I had long since had quite enough of it all. I just wanted to talk about ANYTHING that didn't have to do with their "blessed day".

Thinking back, it was about then that I THOUGHT I had hit my emotional low.

A few weeks before the wedding, there was to be a girls' night-in (kind of like a mini-bachelorette party). By then I had grown to know my future sister-in-law, T (names have been removed to protect the innocent) and had actually begun to like her. However, I barely knew the other girls who were going to attend. The evening started off well enough. There was a little alcohol involved, but we were all pretty light on the spirits. A few hours into an evening that I thought was just supposed to be us girls (imagine painting fingernails, watching chick flicks, etc - all out girliness), the guys showed up. The boyfriends (or fiances) of each of the girls decided to crash our little party and mushiness ensued. With a little wine in me, (it IS a depressant, ya know!) I was in no shape to be so violently confronted with my singleness.

As they all cooed and cuddled one another, I slipped out the front door and stumbled over a few tree stumps into the pitch black of the night. We were at the house of one of the girls and she lived out in the country. So with no moon and very little ambient light, I crumbled at the base of a tree in the back yard while the tears flowed and the bugs began to feast on me.

As I sat there, I was overwhelmed with grief and feelings of loss. I wasn’t where I thought I’d be by then. (I was 26, after all – practically a spinster!) Sure, I’d graduated from college, but there was no dating life going on to speak of at the time and the future looked fairly bleak in that respect as well. I’m sure there are many who don’t know (and probably don’t want to know), but I seriously considered suicide.

I clearly didn’t go through with it. But it makes me sad to think a young woman such as myself would feel such deep despair over being alone.

After all, there should be a big difference between being alone and being lonely, right?

The best laid plans of mice (and me)

2010-09-23T16:14:00.000-04:00

Growing up, I was never one of those girls who had the big book of wedding plans like the one that Monica whips out in Episode 2 of Season 7. I never had my colors chosen years ahead of time. I never dog-eared fabulous wedding gowns in the pages of "Bride" magazine.

It wasn't that I didn't want to get married. In fact, I was the vision of eternal optimism. Even though I came home from every school dance bawling my eyes out because no one had asked me to dance, I always thought that NEXT time would be different. It had to be, right? After all, my mom always told me that she thought she would never get married and she had obviously done that AND had two kids. (Thank goodness she just barely avoided spinsterhood at 19!)

I guess I always just assumed that marriage was an inevitability. After all, hundreds of thousands of people get married every day. So what if no one asked me to dance in high school. There's always college, right? ....Wait, I dated one guy during college until he dropped out during my junior year and I called it off. After that, I never went on a single date during my whole college career..... No matter! When I get out into the "real world", there will be scads of opportunities for dating and marriage. After all, I'm young and I have plenty of time. This is a new world and women are waiting longer to settle down and start their family lives.

Finally after college and out in the "real world" I did finally go out on lots of dates. I was the master of the first date (thanks to an introduction by Match.com, mostly. {sigh}), but I couldn't seem to keep them interested enough for a second date. Sometimes that was just fine with me, but too often I was simply emotional roadkill when that promised "I'll call you" never came.

I always thought that my emotional rock bottom in the relationship area came in 1997 when my (younger) brother told me he was going to ask his girlfriend to marry him. My response to him was an admittedly shameful, “Have you lost your mind?”

There were so many things about the situation that I didn’t understand. First, my YOUNGER brother wasn’t supposed to get married BEFORE me, was he? If he does, what does that mean? What does that say to the world about me? Second, I couldn’t believe he was marrying HER. At the time that they met, my brother and I were very close. We were attending the same college, had lunch together every day and somehow the boy who had driven me nuts when we lived under our parents’ roof had turned into a very good friend.

We were close and SHE was butting in. Matt and I would spend hours hanging with one another before they met, now I wasn’t allowed to spend 15 minutes with him before she needed his undivided attention. And now she was going to be around FOREVER? Til death do they part and all that?

(Stay tuned for the rest of the story.)

I'm an aunt!

2010-08-30T15:06:00.000-04:00

I'm so sorry for the delay, but on Sunday August 22nd, I became an aunt! Miss Madison was born 31 days early and was definitely very baby "rubbery" to begin with, but she was released after just 48 hours as a very strong little girl.

My brother already tells me that she's growing too fast and she's only 9 days old!

She is precious and beautiful and I can't wait to go up and see her soon!

At the hospital waiting for life to change.

2010-08-22T08:17:00.000-04:00

So, I asked you all to hang in with me and I apologized for leaving you for so long. Thanks to all of you who did and hopefully the story will be worth the wait. For now, I simply tell you that I am at the hospital waiting for our lives to change (for the better). Hopefully in just a few hours, I will be welcoming my first niece into my open arms. It's a long story (one I still promise to tell), but this will be the first grandchild for my parents (they are THRILLED beyond belief).

Mandi, my sister-in-law, is being a trooper and doing an amazing job. I'm blessed to have been invited into the delivery room (who knew that was a possibility?!?) to witness the birth and take pictures. Since it's probably the closest I'll get to witnessing a birth up close and personal, I'm so excited. It's emotional and amazing and I can't wait to welcome her!

Don't give up on me!

2010-08-18T16:11:00.000-04:00

For those of you still out there wondering where I am, I know I haven't posted in over a month (EGAD!).

But there's been a ....LOT!......going on in my life.

I promise to get you all caught up in the next few days.

Until then, just him a little "Journey" to yourself and think good things of me:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=barLaHrtvoM

Ask Atgatt Girl - It's Hot!

2010-07-16T15:31:00.000-04:00

Atgatt: All The Gear. All The Time!

Dear Atgatt Girl,

I love riding my own bike and I know that you say I should wear all of my gear all of the time, but during the summer months, it's so hot! How can I stay safe and cool while I'm riding?

Emma Haught

Arizona

Dear Emma,

I imagine it is VERY hot there in Arizona during the summer! But that's no reason not to wear the proper gear. In fact, sometimes when it's hot, wearing all of the gear is even more important!

Staying safe while riding is, of course, always one of my top priorities, but part of staying safe is dressing appropriately for the weather. When it's 85 degrees and I am asked if I'm hot in all of my gear, I either simply rolls my eyes or smart-assedly retort, "that's why I have to ride fast!" There is a kernel of truth to that, but there are better ways to beat the heat than twisting the throttle.

Photograph from:

the Lazy Motorbike site.

I know we've all seen those riders out there sporting shorts and sandals when it's hot. They look like they are probably staying cool, but they are actually making themselves warmer by not gearing up. Sounds wrong, right? It's not! When we get hot, we perspire. When air passes over our damp skin, we cool down a bit. However, riders who are wearing a short-sleeved shirt may be sweating, but that sweat is being quickly dried off of their skin by the warm air they are riding through. What we want to do instead is to take advantage of the combination of our sweat and the wind as we ride. One of the best answers that I've found is mesh gear. These specialized jackets (and pants) provide protection through a number of strategically placed pads (knees, elbows, shoulders, etc) and they are made of a perforated denier poly mesh which is lightweight and yet stands up fairly well to abrasion (like from skidding across the pavement!). My favorite mesh gear for women is made by First Gear. They are well-made, the sizes are accurate and proportionate for women's bodies and they come in caauuute colors! Prices for these jackets are in the $120 to $140 range.

The mesh gear will go a long way in allowing some air to get through while keeping the sun off of your skin, but there are a few tricks that I've learned that add to my comfort when I'm riding in warm weather:

1) Stay hydrated! If your body is low on fluids, it's going to make it harder to sweat and as we discussed already, sweating is the body's air conditioning! When I am riding in the heat, I make sure to stop about every hour to drink. I alternate between water and a sports drink like gatorade.

2) Wet a bandana (or even your shirt) and wrap it around your neck. When the air passes over the wet bandana, it will help to keep your torso cool. You can do the same thing with a banadana on your head under your helmet. It may not be the most attractive look, but you will feel like a new woman!

3) You know those ice storage units at gas stations? While you're making your hydration stop, pop your helmet in there. (Trust me on this one!) In the 5 - 10 minutes it takes you to fuel up and gulp down some water, your helmet will have cooled off considerably. When you put it back on your head, I dare you to tell me that angels don't break out into song for you!

4) Try to avoid riding any distance in the most brutal heat of the day. When I ride long-distance, I try to schedule things so that I leave early in the morning. I then stop for lunch (get off of the bike, sit down in an air-conditioned place or at least find some shade and cool grass) during that hour or so during the day when the sun is really heating things up.

5) Finally, dress in layers. We've been talking about how to beat the heat, but when you've been riding all day in temperatures in the 80s or 90s, you will be amazed how cool it feels as the sun goes down and the temps drop into the 70s! Like your mom always told you, "take a sweater!"

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Don't forget! If you have a question for Atgatt Girl, simply leave a comment and she'll get to you soon!

I have found the anti-christ.......

2010-07-13T13:36:00.002-04:00

and her name is Betty Crocker!

I've told you a bit about my relatively new habit of couponing. I don't do it nearly as well as people who have kids and families may, but I've been pretty proud of my savings over the last few months. A few weeks ago CVS has a discount on the Betty Crocker Warm Delights. They are on sale for just 88 cents and I had 2 coupons for 75 cents off on 1. That means this new desserty item from Betty Crocker for just 13 cents!

.............THAT was the good news.

....The bad new is.....these are seriously good! And CRAZY easy! 2 tablespoons of water and a few minutes in the microwave and you have creamy, chocolatey, fudgy goodness. If one is an emotional eater and lives alone, this is DANGEROUS!

Not that I know anyone like that........

Just sayin'......

There's still time to vote!

2010-07-07T13:49:00.000-04:00

There's still time to vote for Sasha and to register for the Target gift cards! Just a reminder that this is a fundraiser for the Indianapolis Humane Society.

Currently, they are at capacity and desperately in need of donations to make sure that the 550(!) dogs and cats in their care are fed and sheltered well. The average cost for an animal's stay at the shelter is $600 and the facility operates on donations alone. I know that any donation (and/or vote for Sasha) would be greatly appreciated.

If you are unable to give money and are in the area, there is also a list of supplies that are needed. For the shelter's wish list, click here.

My heart breaks that I can do no more than spread the word to you about their plight. I've attached a news release being sent out by the facility about their needs.

Humane Society of Indianapolis reaches limit of animals it can care for with current resources.

IndyHumane’s budget and staff stretched to capacity as shelter cares for more animals than ever.

INDIANAPOLIS (July 7, 2010) – The Humane Society of Indianapolis (IndyHumane), currently caring for more than 500 kittens, puppies and mature cats and dogs, has reached the limit of the number of animals it can care for with its current financial and staffing resources and is asking the public for support of its mission, services and animals.

IndyHumane has a balanced budget for 2010 that allows it to care for 300 animals at any given time. Due to the dramatic increase in the number of homeless and unwanted animals in the Indianapolis area in recent months, though, the shelter is currently caring for 550 cats and dogs and must take measures to reduce the intake of more animals.

The Humane Society of Indianapolis typically asks people who wish to surrender pets and strays to call for an appointment to bring cats and dogs to the shelter. This allows staff to ensure proper care and adequate space for every animal that comes in. However, due to the large number of animals currently in the shelter’s care and its limited resources, it cannot currently take walk-in owner surrenders. The shelter’s schedule for people wishing to surrender animals is full until the first week of August, and appointments from then on will be scheduled as resources become available.

The Indy-based and independent shelter does not euthanize for space or time. It currently has 150 animals available for adoption, with a total of 400 living at the 7929 N. Michigan Road facility and 150 more in foster homes. Though IndyHumane invests, on average, $600 in medical, behavioral and shelter services per animal, regular adoption fees remain low: $35 for some cats, and $150 at the highest, for puppies.

“An army of 250 animal lovers sponsoring an animal for $600 each will help us alleviate financial strains, though any gift will help the animals and our mission,” said John Aleshire, Humane Society of Indianapolis CEO.

The current situation reflects general economic circumstances, as well as a recently updated mission and change of culture. The Humane Society of Indianapolis revised its mission in 2009 to better reflect new life-saving initiatives and an increased focus on public services, in addition to its traditional pet-adoption programs. In 2009, the shelter saved the lives of 85% of incoming stray and surrendered animals – 30% more than in 2008. IndyHumane also works with other local animal-welfare groups to save more animals, though these groups have experienced similar pressures, according to Christine Jeschke, Humane Society of Indianapolis Director of Operations. “We’re contacted daily with pleas from local rescues and shelters asking us to help their animals. It breaks my heart to have to turn them away.”

The shelter’s leadership recognizes that its current life-saving programs rely on donor support and the efforts of a small staff. “As hard as we are striving to be one of the nation’s premier animal shelters, we also have to be fiscally responsible and live within our means,” said Aleshire. “That has not always been the case in years past. We’re now a very lean and frugal organization. We’re caring for more animals than we ever have with much less staff than two years ago, and they continue to find ways to make every dollar stretch and be used responsibly.”

Larger economic concerns have impacted the non-profit. The shelter’s intake area has seen more people than ever surrender their pets due to financial difficulties, as people have lost their jobs or their homes and have had to focus greater resources on caring for their families. Other financial concerns have affected the shelter as well. IndyHumane’s veterinary team has seen the price of an antibiotic used daily to save the lives of kittens with severe eye infections skyrocket from $2 to nearly $20.

“When people tour IndyHumane, they are always moved by the scope and depth of our services,” Aleshire said. “I invite any member of the community to contact us and arrange for a behind-the-scenes tour to see all of our services in action. They’ll see that the overwhelming need in our community far surpasses our resources, and that their charitable contributions and support are used wisely.”

Aleshire says that the public can help the animals in IndyHumane’s care by lending financial support, by donating items found on the organization’s wish list, or by utilizing a number of IndyHumane’s services, including a recently opened low-cost vaccine clinic. To sponsor an animal’s care, call the Humane Society of Indianapolis at 317-872-5650 ext. 125. For more information, visit IndyHumane.org.

Ask Atgatt Girl - SUPER!

2010-06-25T10:19:00.001-04:00

Atgatt: All The Gear. All The Time!

Dear Atgatt Girl,

I am a new motorcycle rider, but so far I've just been riding my brother's extra bike. How should I go about choosing a motorcycle for myself?

Valerie Star
Yamaha, PA

Dear Val,

Congratulations on contemplating taking the plunge into motorcycle ownership! That's very exciting. I know it can probably feel a bit daunting at first to consider all of the different motorcycles available. In my own search for my first bike, I took several things into account. Over the last 6 years of riding I've tried to keep them in mind as I continue to look at new motorcycles. You know, because a girl can never have too many motorcycles, right?

There are basically 5 main things I consider when looking for a new motorcycle. If you just remember that motorcycles are SUPER, you'll be all set. SUPER stands for Size, Upkeep, Price, Extras and Ride.

Size: I think one of the most important factors is how a motorcycle fits you ergonomically. Whether you are short or tall, find a bike that you are comfortable on. I'm a short girl (5'1" without boots on) and since I was a new rider, I wanted a bike that I could comfortably "flat-foot" when I was stopped. Motorcycles are heavy (between 500 and 1000+ pounds) and I didn't want to have to worry about the bike tipping over on me because I had to balance the weight on just one leg. You also want to make sure that you can comfortably reach everything with your arms and legs. Lots of new motorcycles have the foot pegs placed closer to the front of the bike than the middle. When that's the case, even if I can touch the ground when I'm stopped, I can't reach the shifter or brake while the bike is in motion. That makes actually operating the bike extremely difficult, to say the least. Make sure the distance to the handle bars is long enough or short enough for your arms to comfortably reach for an extended period of time.

So, when you're out looking at motorcycles, {carefully} sit on them! Make sure that when you sit on the seat, you can reach the foot pegs. The showrooms generally have enough space between bikes for you to stand the bike up while sitting on it, so do that. Get a feel for how heavy it is and whether you think you'd be able to lift it off of it's sidestand several times without being exhausted. Turn the handle bars a bit to make sure your reach is long enough. Don't worry. They EXPECT you to do this!

Upkeep: This is where knowing yourself and how much you like doing your own "wrenching" comes in handy. Do some research on how much maintenance a bike takes. Talk to a motorcycle mechanic (or search the web). Some bikes are built like tanks and you can practically run them into the ground. Others are a bit more touchy and require a constant eye. What is the routine maintence schedule for the bike (generally it's either every 3000 miles, 4000 miles or 6000 miles)? If you like working on the bike yourself, what kinds of skills are required to do that routine maintenance? If you don't like working on the bike yourself, how much are you going to have to pay someone else to do the maintenance? (I like to call that the "How much to take away my pain?" test.)

Price: Speaking of "How much to take away my pain?", let's not forget about the purchase price of the bike! If this is your first bike, I definitely recommend looking into used bikes. You can usually find them very reasonably priced with very few miles. Also know that, just like with cars, some bikes are just going to be more expensive because of the name on them. When I bought my first bike, I didn't have the scratch for a Harley Davidson (what my brother drove) or a BMW (what Troy rides). There were lots of affordable options made by Yamaha and Suzuki though. I bought a Yamaha for about 1/4 of what a Harley would have cost me and I've been more than pleased with my choice.

As well as the purchase price, take into consideration what the insurance will cost on the bike. Sport bikes are generally more expensive to insure than cruisers.

Extras: For some motorcyclists it's all about the extras. They like to farkle (a combination of "function" and "sparkle") their motorcycle with GPS Systems, auxiliary lights, radar detectors, etc. If this is something that interests you and a motorcycle that you are considering already has some of these things, great. If those items are not already on the bike, make sure you check to make sure adding them would be a possibility. Specifically find out whether you would need an extra power source to power those devices as they can pull quite a bit of juice from the battery. In addition to all of the electrical gadgets, I also take into consideration things like saddle bag space and pillion (passenger) seat back rest, since those are things that are crucial for me to stow gear on longer rides.

That brings us to the Ride: Find the bike that fits the type of riding that you will be doing most.

My first bike was a Yamaha V-star 650. That's a 650 cc engine. When I got it, the bike seemed big to me, but my brother said I would be unhappy if I got a smaller bike and I would have been. I routinely took it to the same shop for any maintenance it needed. If there was a leak of some sort, I got it checked out. I rode the heck out of that bike. But that was the problem! For the long-distance, high-speed riding that we were routinely doing, the 650 was the wrong choice of bike for me. Unfortunately none of my (FORMER) mechanics clued me into this fact and as a novice rider, I didn't know any better. I thought it was normal for your hands to go numb and to have a pounding headache at the end of the day from the vibration of the bike. As an experienced rider, I now see how silly that sounds, but back then I just didn't know any better.

I learned the hard way what an appropriate bike for the job feels like. After a major tran$mi$$ion failure on a ride to St. Louis a few years ago, I happened upon a Yamaha V-star 1100. {cue the angelic chorus!} THIS is the bike I should have had from the beginning. Although it looks nearly exactly the same to the casual observer, the real difference is shown with the twist of the throttle. When I take it out on the highway, I have been known to hit 90 and not even realize it. By comparison, on my old bike, the fillings in my teeth being shaken out of my head told me when I had hit 80.

So figure out what kind of riding you are going to be doing and pick the bike that works best for that job. If you are just going to be commuting to and from work 10 miles away, maybe that little 250 cc engine will be just what you need. If you are young and fun (and don't have any back problems), a sport bike may be just the ticket.

Just remember as you go out to look for a motorcycle of your very own just how SUPER fun it can be!

Does bribery work?

2010-06-23T13:00:00.000-04:00

Okay, kids! I plugged Sasha's entry into the Indianapolis Humane Society's Poster Pooch contest the other day and got an okay response.

So, perhaps I should up the ante. Originally I promised a prize worth $25 if Ms. Sasha received at least 150 votes. Perhaps I can go one better. Here it is:

If Ms. Sasha receives 150 votes, 1 lucky winner will receive a $25 Target Gift Card.
If she receives 250 votes, I will give away TWO $25 Target Gift Cards.
If she receives 500 votes, I will give away THREE $25 Target Gift Cards AND if I have 100 followers, 1 lucky follower will receive an additional $25 Gift Card.

I know you can rise to this challenge and help support all of those loveable animals at the Indianapolis Humane Society. Each vote is just $1 and the minimum number of votes is 5. Once you've voted, either leave a message here or on the original post. There's no need to be a follower, but if you are, that gives you another chance to win.

Thanks so much for reading my blog and voting for such an adorable dog.

If you would like to do more than just donate and have a place in your home and heart for a new family member, the Humane Society is running an adoption special until the end of the June. IndyHumane is flooded with hundreds of unwanted cats and dogs, and until the end of June you can adopt any animal one year of age or older for 50% off their regular adoption fee! That 50% off adoption fee includes microchipping and spay or neutering. If you are looking for a pet, this is the perfect time to go down and check out all of the available fuzziness!

Sasha's Shameless Plug

2010-06-21T16:34:00.001-04:00

I believe in putting my money (and my blog) where my mouth is. I don't often plug things on here, but I'm doing it now....shamelessly.

The Indianapolis Humane Society is a really great organization that is supported solely by donations. They are a no-kill shelter. That means as long as an animal is healthy and adoptable, they can live at the shelter for years. There is no expiration date on an animal simply because they've been around too long. Consequently, personal donations of food, supplies and money are the livelihood of the facility. They hold several fundraising events each year. Among these events is the Mutt Strut. It's held at the beginning of May and it's touted as a day when the track goes to the dogs because it happens at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway. Sasha and I have attended the last 2 years and while this year was a rainy mess, she had a blast in 2009. There are lots of great vendors giving away free samples of food and offering medical check-ups for dogs. It's just an amazingly fun doggy day.

Sasha!

So, here comes my plug! Each year all the participants receive a t-shirt as part of their registration costs. On the front of that t-shirt is the photo of the "Poster Pooch". I would love nothing more than for Sasha to get to be that Poster Pooch for the 2011 Mutt Strut. (I mean, seriously! She's adorable!) Here's where we need your help. Go here to vote for her. Each vote is $1 ($5 minimum) and ALL proceeds go to help some of our neglected, furry friends. Right now she's waaay behind in the voting. It's totally my fault and not at all a reflection on her lack of cuteness. Did I mention that she's seriously cute!?! The 11 runners-up will be part of a photo shoot and a 2011 doggy calender. She'd be cool winning that if she can't have the top prize. She's a giver, ya know!

Do you need more motivation than her fuzzy wuzzy muzzle? Oh, okay! If the great Sashinator receives more than 150 votes, you will be rewarded. I will give away a prize package (worth at least $25) to one lucky voter. Simply leave me a comment telling me that you voted and you'll be entered. No need to become a follower. Of course, if you want to be kept aprised of the contest, you might want to anyway.

Thanks so much for your time and your donation.

Stop by tomorrow to find out about the amazing adoption deal that the Humane Society of Indianapolis is having right now.

Ask Atgatt Girl

2010-06-18T12:24:00.000-04:00

Atgatt: All The Gear. All The Time!

Dear Atgatt Girl,

I've been considering learning to ride a motorcycle of my own. I've ridden on the back of my boyfriend's bike for a few year, but I see other women riding their own bikes and I wonder if that might be something I could do. What 3 things would you tell women who are thinking about learning to ride their own bike?

- H Davidson

Sturgis, SD

Dear H,

Thanks for writing in and congratulations on thinking about joining an elite class of women. As Virginia Slims say, we've come a long way, baby! Female riders are an ever increasing portion of the field of riders and luckily our voices are being heard by the manufacturers of motorcycles and motorcycle apparel.

I know that from my own experience, thinking about learning to ride your own bike can be a bit overwhelming. When it comes to learning the ropes, the first 3 things I would say would be:

1. Take a motorcycle safety class! In Indiana, motorcycle safety courses are offered through Abate of Indiana. Something similar exists in every state. For me, this step was a life saver! Before my class, I had never been on anything with 2 wheels other than a bicycle. The classes can usually be taken over the course of a weekend or several evenings during the week and cost less than $100. Small motorcycles (around 250cc engines) are usually provided and they are taught by certified instructors. The classes are broken down into a textbook portion and a riding portion. They are held on a closed site (usually a large parking lot), so there is no other traffic to worry about. They will teach you everything from the very basics about your motorcycle to how to stop quickly without laying the bike down. At the end of the class, there is a written test as well as a basic riding test. If you pass these tests, you will receive a certificate of completion and (at least in the state of Indiana) a waiver of the riding test when you go to get the motorcycle endorsement for your driver's license.

Some of you may have boyfriends or husbands who assure you they can teach you to ride. I beg of you, kindly DECLINE their offers. I have seen way too many conflicts arise from this scenario. For instance, while your husband/boyfriend may be a patient, caring man. I assure you if he has been riding for any period of time, he has picked up some bad riding habits. You are better offer learning from someone who is not emotionally involved and who is an expert motorcycle instructor. I promise.

2. Get appropriate riding gear that fits you and wear it! I'm certain to rile up all kinds of talk on this one, but I believe in riding gear. That's what ATGATT stands for. All The Gear All The Time. I've noticed an interesting phenomenon.

Invariably when I see a man and a woman riding together (either both on one bike or each on their own bikes), they are always similarly dressed. I'm not talking about matching t-shirts or helmets. I'm saying that if her man is comfortable riding in a do-rag, jeans and flip-flops, more than likely, a woman is gonna be wearing similar items. If you are going to start riding, please don't do this. You need the proper gear. That means pants, jacket, gloves, boots and a helmet. If your man loves your beautiful legs wrapped around him, then shouldn't he want you to keep them looking beautiful? Nothing is LESS sexy than burnt flesh on your thighs from hot pipes or worse. {WARNING. Do NOT click here if you have a squeamish stomach or don't really want to know what road rash looks like.}

Motorcycle gear for women has come a LONG way. Manufacturers have finally figured out that we aren't just smaller men and that we come in all shapes and sizes. I'll cover more on what to look for in gear in the coming weeks, but First Gear has some really great looking, high quality, reasonably priced gear for women. I wear it and I love it. While quality riding clothes may be pricier than your husband's old motorcycle cycle jacket, just remember that $1000 in gear is worth $10,000 in skin grafts. It may not be pretty, but it's true.

3. Ride your own ride. Let me say that again. Ride your OWN ride. I'm not talking about the motorcycle that you sit astride, but the manner in which you navigate that motorcycle. If your riding companions think you take too long to put on your gear or you don't ride fast enough, say ok ... and then ride your own ride! Tell them you'll catch up with them at your destination or just that you'd rather not ride with them that day. It is so important, especially in the beginning, that you not ride beyond your comfort or capability. This is your safety that they are messing with and you are in charge of it.

This doesn't mean that you'll never ride with them, but it's important that you find your own "riding voice". Troy and I have very different riding styles. He has been riding for well over 25 years. I have been riding for 6. He LOVES the twisty roads where he can lean his bike over until hard parts scrape. I would rather open up the throttle and whiz down the open highway at 85 mph. (Sorry, mom!) I wasn't able to say those things in the beginning without thinking I wasn't a "real" rider because I was comparing myself to him. The important thing is that I know it now how I like to ride. We still have very enjoyable rides together. We simply find a path and a destination that both of us can enjoy.

"Sex and the City" and summer motorcycling!

2010-06-17T23:24:00.025-04:00

Wednesday night my girls and I went to check out the new(ish) "Sex in the City" movie. As we nestled into our theater seats, we practically had the place to ourselves. I know the critics have panned it, I actually enjoyed (most of) it. I can honestly say that the writers have matured the characters of Miranda, Carrie and Charlotte (in a good way). The three of them are each married to men who seemingly adore them. Carrie is struggling with settling into married life with Mr. Big. Miranda is trying to balance being a wonderful attorney with being an equally wonderful and attentive mother. Charlotte is having a crisis of conscience as she tries to come to terms with the fact that her 2 lovely daughters, who she wanted so desperately for so long, are driving her insane!

One of my favorite scenes in the movie is where Miranda and Charlotte are comiserating about the difficulties of motherhood over a cocktail. They both clearly love their children, but they are sometimes overwhelmed as well. I'm certain that most mothers feel this sometimes. So, while the writing might not be the most clever ever put to paper, the conversation seems genuine and cathartic for both of the women.

My heart also broke for Carrie as she called Mr. Big after an encounter with Aiden. She is obviously in anguish and desperately needs a response from Mr. Big, which she's not receiving. The angst she exudes is not of the teenage variety, but instead it is the genuine misery of realizing the consequences her thoughts and actions may have. It was a great example of truly figuring out what we as women need and want.

HOWEVER....my one (huge!) gripe about the movie was Samantha. While Miranda, Charlotte and Carrie had tender moments of insight and true feeling, Samantha seemed like more of a caricature. Yes, she's always been bawdy and sexually forward, but things have gone waaaay too far in this movie. I'm sure for some, it's what they've grown to love and expect from Samantha, but I guess I was kind of hoping that at 52, she would have matured a bit and learned something more than just how to stay hot enough to land a man. Perhaps, as a single lady, I am too sensitive, but it's as if the writers couldn't come up with a plot line for a single woman that consisted of anything deeper or more interesting than chasing pants.

__________________________________________________________________________________

Moving on............

Some serious, mad, crazy props go out to Troy! Summer is upon us and for me, that means riding season! There's just something about the smell of the open road and the roar of the engine when you twist the throttle that makes all the worries of life just melt away. I planned to ride my motorcycle to meet the girls for the movie, but when I went out to start the bike, it wouldn't turn over (DESPITE being on the battery charger for the last few days!). Ugh. My heart sank. I knew it was time to get a new battery. The problem was that it was 5:45 and I was pretty sure the bike shops would all be closing in the next 15 minutes AND I needed to get to the movie by 6:30.

After I called around to a few places, I finally found a battery for my bike in stock at Cycle Outfitters. I had kept Troy apprised of the situation (I can totally take care of these things myself, but it's nice to have someone there to back you up). He asked how late they were open (8 PM, woohoo!) and offered to go pick it up for me. What a man! Score! By the time I got home from a lovely evening with the girls, he had prepped my bike so that he could show me how to install it. (By the way, it was easy peasy and I totally could have figured it out on my own. Still...it was very nice to have his help.) Thanks to Troy's generosity, I was able to ride in to work the last few days! Woohoo!

Speaking of motorcycling, I've had quite a few friends lately who expressed an interest in taking up motorcycling as a hobby. So with the start of summer just a week away, I thought I'd take one day a week to talk about some of the things to consider when thinking about learning to "ride your own" in a series I'm calling "Ask Atgatt Girl". Come back tomorrow for her first installment.